Actual Newspaper Headlines

• British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
• Eye Drops off Shelf
• Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead
• Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
• Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told
• Miners Refuse to Work after Death
• Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
• Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
• Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter
• Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years
• Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in `84
• If Strike isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While
• Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
• Enfields Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
• Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge
• Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
• Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge
• New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
• Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
• Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
• British Union Finds Dwarfs in Short Supply
• Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
• Air Head Fired
• Steals Clock, Faces Time
• Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni
• Man Loses Legs, Vows to Continue Arms Protest

Source: Internet circulation