Ways Teens Lose Communication with Parents

Be sarcasic
Never use sarcasm to belittle your parents: for example, "my old lady" or "my old man." Do not act in front of your friends as if your parents are stupid, using gestures, words, looks of disgust-you know what I mean! Do not betray your parents by discussing them at school with your friends, laughing at their weaknesses and failures.

Publicly embarrass your parent
Do not contradict your parents in front of their friends. This will embarrass them beyond measure. Talk to them about it later. Do not talk impudently to your parents, especially in front of their friends. People begin to lose respect for you, too! Do not ignore the fact that you have been spoken to. Be courteous and reply, even if you're about to bite yourself because someone has said, "My, how you've grown!" (What did they expect? you're thinking!)

Be shocked
You must realize that it's not the easiest thing in the world to be a parent. When your parent seems ill at ease in the discussion of sex, don't make it hard on them by acting shocked at what they say or how they say it. Remember, they didn't talk freely about sex like you do, and it's hard for them to shift gears in this area. When you see your parent acting or talking in a way that shocks you, at the right time, sit down and ask them why they did this. If you can tell them how it affected you, a new understanding may follow, and you can talk more freely about some of your other hangups, and theirs as well.

Be dogmatic
Be sure when we want something, that we're not stubborn with our reasoning. Do not rationalize your mistakes. Your parents will be much more lenient than you think if you will admit that you're wrong! Remember that the surer you are about what you believe, the sweeter you can be when someone differs with you. It's when you're not sure that you tend to come unglued when you're challenged.

Bluff
You must remember that each parent alive has already been along the road you're traveling. They've already used all those same excuses, rationalized just like you do, told "those little white lies" and half truths. Do you ever wonder how in the world they caught on? Well, teenager, they've been there before and know all the road signs! Bluffing probably does more to make a parent tend not to trust their teenager than anything else.

Be Negative
Don't make up your mind that you're not going to like the thing that your parent will suggest! Or that just because your parents like a certain friend, an idea, or a situation it will be the worst possible thing that could happen to you! When you're in your early twenties, you're going to be surprised at how smart your parents have become! Remember that your parents are people, and that they're probably doing the best that they know how to do! Now, they may make some glaring mistakes, but they do love you and want you not to make the same mistakes they did!

Can you take a difference of opinion as a teenager?
How do you act when your parents differ with you as to whether you should do something or not? Do you throw a fit and froth at the mouth? Don't you know a compromise can be reached much better if you remain calm and try to talk it over? It'll be hard to control yourself, but it surely pays off in the long run! Do you greet your parents with the phrase "Everybody's doing it." and can't understand their fury and their retort, "I don't care what everybody's doing. I'm just responsible for you!" Well, you see, because everybody's doing it really isn't a very valid reason for you to do it, now is it? Don't you know some things that everybody's doing that you know isn't good or right to do?

Refuse to listen to your parent's music!
No telling what you may find out about your parents when you listen to their music! Do they like the real dreamy, romantic, type of music? Well, do you see why? Because they're that type of person!

Adapted from "Speak Out with Marge" by Marge Caldwell (Broadman Press)