Archive | May, 2009

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skitsforfunandlearning.jpg

Through a partnership with Christian Counseling and Education Service (CCES) I am now able to offer you a wonderful resources for your drama or puppet ministry that will help your children to Learn, Love and Live the Word of God!

Posted in Drama IdeasComments

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A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his young son waiting for him at the door.

‘Daddy, may I ask you a question?’

‘Yeah sure, what it is?’ replied the man.

‘Daddy, how much do you make an hour?’

Posted in Teaching IllustrationsComments

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LOG ON: Making the woodstove hotter
LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood
MONITOR: Keepin an eye on that woodstove
DOWNLOAD: Gettin the farwood off the truk
MEGA HERTZ: When yer not keerful gettin that farwood downloaded
FLOPPY DISK: Whutcha git from tryin to carry too much farwood
RAM: That thar thang whut splits th farwood
HARD DRIVE: Gettin home in th winter tym
PROMPT: Whut the mail ain’t in the winter tym
WINDOWS: Whut to shut when its cold outside
SCREEN: Whut to shut when its blak fly season
BYTE: Whut them dang flys do
CHIP: Munchies fer the TV
MICRO CHIP: Whuts left in the munchie bag
INFRARED: Whur the left over munchies go, Fred eats em
MODEM: Whatcha did to the hay fields
DOT MATRIX: Ol Dan Matrix’s wife
LAP TOP: Whur the kitty sleeps
KEYBOARD: Whur ya hang the dang keys
SOFTWARE: Them dang plastik forks and nifes
MOUSE: What eats th grain in th barn
MAIN FRAME: Holds up th barn ruuf
PORT: Fancy Flatlander Wine
ENTER: Northern fer c’mon in y’all
RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: When ya caint member whut ya paid for yer new rifle when yore wife ask

Posted in HumorComments

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Grandmas are for stories about things of long ago.
Grandmas are for caring about all the things you know…
Grandmas are for rocking you and singing you to sleep.
Grandmas are for giving you nice memories to keep…
Grandmas are for knowing all the things you’re dreaming of…
But, most importantly of all, Grandmas are for love.

Posted in Teaching IllustrationsComments

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For the first four or five years after I had children, I considered motherhood a temporary condition – not a calling. It was a time of my life set aside for exhaustion and long hours. It would pass. Then one afternoon with three kids in tow, I came out of the supermarket pushing a cart (with four wheels that went in opposite directions) when my toddler son got away from me.

Posted in HumorComments

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4 years old: My Mommy can do anything!
8 years old: My Mom knows a lot! A whole lot!
12 years old: My Mother doesn’t really know quite everything.
14 years old: Naturally, Mother doesn’t know that, either.
16 years old: Mother? She’s hopelessly old-fashioned.
18 years old: That old woman? She’s way out of date!
25 years old: Well, she might know a little bit about it.
35 years old: Before we decide, let’s get Mom’s opinion.
45 years old: Wonder what Mom would have thought about it?
65 years old: Wish I could talk it over with Mom

Posted in Teaching IllustrationsComments

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“A small child waits with impatience the arrival home of a parent. She wishes to relate some sandbox experience. She is excited to share the thrill that she has known that day. The time comes; the parent arrives. Beaten down by the stresses of the workplace the parent often replies: “Not now, honey, I’m busy, go watch television.” The most often spoken words in the American household today are the words: go watch television. If not now, when? Later. But later never comes for many and the parent fails to communicate at the very earliest of ages. We give her designer clothes and computer toys, but we do not give her what she wants the most, which is our time. Now, she is fifteen and has a glassy look in her eyes. Honey, do we need to sit down and talk? Too late. Love has passed by.”

Posted in Parents Ministry, Teaching IllustrationsComments

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Mother’s Day is around the corner and Creative Youth Ideas has lots of ideas for your special mother’s day activity or event.

There are ideas for a Children’s Sermon on Mothers Day and illustrations and stories for a sermon to mothers or youth talk. There are also some great Mother’s Day games and other ideas for that Special Mother’s Day event.

Posted in Announcements, Parents MinistryComments

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A man stopped at a flower shop to order some flowers to be wired to his mother who lived two hundred miles away. As he got out of his car he noticed a young girl sitting on the curb sobbing.

Posted in Parents Ministry, Teaching IllustrationsComments

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A little boy was told by his doctor that he could save his sister’s life by giving her some blood. The six-year-old girl was near death, a victim of disease from which the boy had made a marvelous recovery two years earlier.

Posted in Teaching IllustrationsComments

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