{"id":2992,"date":"2005-12-07T14:25:47","date_gmt":"2005-12-07T14:25:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.creativeyouthideas.com\/resources\/?p=2992"},"modified":"2021-04-09T09:40:26","modified_gmt":"2021-04-09T01:40:26","slug":"things-not-to-say-when-hanging-the-lights","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.creativeyouthideas.com\/resources\/humor\/things-not-to-say-when-hanging-the-lights\/","title":{"rendered":"Things Not to Say When Hanging the Lights"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"christmasbulbs.jpg\"Did you know that hanging lights on a Christmas tree is one of the three most stressful situations in an on-going relationship? The other two danger zones are teaching your mate to drive and wallpapering.<\/p>\n

As a service to our dear readers, we rush to print with an emergency list of Things Not To Say When Hanging Lights on the Christmas Tree.<\/p>\n

~ “You’ve got two red lights right next to each other, goober. You’re supposed to go yellow, green, red, blue, not yellow, red, red, green, blue…”<\/p>\n

~ “Up a little higher. You can reach it. Go on, try.”<\/p>\n

~ “What on earth do you do to these lights when you put them away every year? Tie them in knots?”<\/p>\n

~ “Give me that.”<\/p>\n

~ “You’ve got the whole thing on the tree upside-down. The electric pluggee thing should be down here at the bottom, not up at the top.”<\/p>\n

~ “I don’t care if you have found another two strings, I’m done!”<\/p>\n

~ “You’ve just wound ’em around and around – I thought we agreed it shouldn’t look like a perfect spiral this year?”<\/p>\n

~ “Have you been drinking?”<\/p>\n

~ “Where’s the cat?”<\/p>\n

~ “If you’re not going to do it right, don’t do it at all. Don’t just throw them on, like you do the icicles. You’re worse than your father.”<\/p>\n

Source:\u00a0www.mikeysFunnies.com<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

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\"\"<\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Did you know that hanging lights on a Christmas tree is one of the three most stressful situations in an on-going relationship? The other two danger zones are teaching your mate to drive and wallpapering. As a service to our dear readers, we rush to print with an emergency list of Things Not To Say … Continue reading Things Not to Say When Hanging the Lights<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2992","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t