Smiles from the Bible

Q. What kind of man was Boaz before he married?
A. Ruth-less.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.

Q. What was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh’s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.

Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury. David’s Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda, because the apostles were all in one Accord.

Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.

Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.

Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest baby sitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

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Birdies

Throughout our lives we are blessed with spiritual experiences, some of which are very sacred and confidential, and others, although sacred, are meant to be shared. Last summer my family had a spiritual experience that had a lasting and profound impact on us, one we feel must be shared.

It’s a message of love. It’s a message of regaining perspective, and restoring proper balance and renewing priorities. In humility. I pray that I might, in relating this story, give you a gift my little son, Brian gave our family one summer day last year.

This is proported to be a true story that occurred in 1994 and was told by Lloyd Glen.

Throughout our lives we are blessed with spiritual experiences, some of which are very sacred and confidential, and others, although sacred, are meant to be shared. Last summer my family had a spiritual experience that had a lasting and profound impact on us, one we feel must be shared.

It’s a message of love. It’s a message of regaining perspective, and restoring proper balance and renewing priorities. In humility. I pray that I might, in relating this story, give you a gift my little son, Brian gave our family one summer day last year.

On July 22nd I was en route to Washington DC for a business trip. It was all so very ordinary, until we landed in Denver for a plane change. As I collected my belongings from the overhead bin, an announcement was made for Mr. Lloyd Glenn to see the United Customer Service Representative immediately. I thought nothing of it until I reached the door to leave the plane and I heard a gentleman asking every male if they were Mr. Glenn. At this point I knew something was wrong and my heart sunk.

When I got off the plane a solemn-faced young man came toward me and said, “Mr. Glenn there is an emergency at your home. I do not know what the emergency is, or who is involved, but I will take you to the phone so you can call the hospital.” My heart was now pounding, but the will to be calm took over. Woodenly, I followed this stranger to the distant telephone where I called the number he gave me for the Mission Hospital. My call was put through to the trauma center where I learned that my three-year-old son had been trapped underneath the automatic garage door for several minutes, and that when my wife had found him he was dead.

CPR had been performed by a neighbor, who is a doctor, and the paramedics had continued the treatment as Brian was transported to the hospital. By the time of my call, Brian was revived and they believed he would live, but they did not know how much damage had been done to his brain, nor to his heart. They explained that the door had completely closed on his little sternum right over his heart. He had been severely crushed.

After speaking with the medical staff, my wife sounded worried but not hysterical, and I took comfort in her calmness. The return flight seemed to last forever, but finally I arrived at the hospital six hours after the garage door had come down. When I walked into the intensive care unit, nothing could have prepared me to see my little son laying so still on a great big bed with tubes and monitors everywhere.

He was on a respirator. I glanced at my wife who stood and tried to give me a reassuring smile. It all seemed like a terrible dream. I was filled in with the details and given a guarded prognosis. Brian was going to live, and the preliminary tests indicated that his heart was ok — two miracles, in and of themselves. But only time would tell if his brain received any damage.

Throughout the seemingly endless hours, my wife was calm. She felt that Brian would eventually be all right. I hung on to her words and faith like a lifeline. All that night and the next day Brian remained unconscious. It seemed like forever since I had left for my business trip the day before. Finally at two o’clock that afternoon, our son regained consciousness and sat up uttering the most beautiful words I have ever heard spoken, He said, “Daddy hold me,” and he reached for me with his little arms.

By the next day he was pronounced as having no neurological or physical deficits, and the story of his miraculous survival spread throughout the hospital. You cannot imagine our gratitude and joy.

As we took Brian home we felt a unique reverence for the life and love of our Heavenly Father that comes to those who brush death so closely. In the days that followed there was a special spirit about our home. Our two older children were much closer to their little brother. My wife and I were much closer to each other, and all of us were very close as a whole family. Life took on a less stressful pace. Perspective seemed to be more focused, and balance much easier to gain and maintain. We felt deeply blessed. Our gratitude was truly profound.

Almost a month later to the day of the accident, Brian awoke from his afternoon nap and said, “Sit down mommy. I have something to tell you.” At this time in his life, Brian usually spoke in small phrases, so to say a large sentence surprised my wife. She sat down with him on his bed and he began his sacred and remarkable story.

“Do you remember when I got stuck under the garage door? Well it was so heavy and it hurt really bad. I called to you, but you couldn’t hear me. I started to cry, but then it hurt too bad. And then the ‘birdies’ came. “The birdies?” my wife asked puzzled. Yes,” he replied. “The ‘birdies’ made a whooshing sound and flew into the garage. They took care of me.” “They did?” “Yes, he said.” “One of the ‘birdies’ came and got you. She came to tell you I got stuck under the door.”

A sweet reverent feeling filled the room. The spirit was so strong and yet lighter than air. My wife realized that a three year-old had no concept of death and spirits, so he was referring to the beings who came to him from beyond as “birdies” because they were up in the air like birds that fly.

“What did the birdies look like?” she asked.

Brian answered. “They were so beautiful. They were dressed in white all white. Some of them had green and white. But some of them had on just white.”

“Did they say anything?” “Yes” he answered. “They told me the baby would be alright.” “The baby?” my wife asked confused. And Brian answered. “The baby laying on the garage floor.” He went on, “You came out and opened the garage door and ran to the baby. You told the baby to stay and not leave.”

My wife nearly collapsed upon hearing this, for she had indeed gone and knelt beside Brian’s body and seeing his crushed chest and unrecognizable features, knowing he was already dead, she looked up around her and whispered, “Don’t leave us Brian, please stay if you can.”

As she listened to Brian telling her the words she had spoken, she realized that the spirit had left his body and was looking down from above on this little lifeless form. “Then what happened?” she asked. “We went on a trip,” he said, “far, far away..” He grew agitated trying to say the things he didn’t seem to have the words for. My wife tried to calm and comfort him, and let him know it would be okay. He struggled with wanting to tell something that obviously was very important to him, but finding the words was difficult.

“We flew so fast up in the air.” “They’re so pretty Mommy.” he added. “And there is lots and lots of ‘birdies’. My wife was stunned. Into her mind the sweet comforting spirit enveloped her more soundly, but with an urgency she had never before known.

Brian went on to tell her that the ‘birdies’ had told him that he had to come back and tell everyone about the ‘birdies’. He said they brought him back to the house and that a big fire truck, and an ambulance were there. A man was bringing the baby out on a white bed and he tried to tell the man the baby would be okay, but the man couldn’t hear him. He said, ‘birdies’ told him he had to go with the ambulance, but they would be near him. He said, they were so pretty and so peaceful, and he didn’t want to come back. And then the bright light came. He said that the light was so bright and so warm, and he loved the bright light so much. Someone was in the bright light and put their arms around him, and told him, “I love you but you have to go back.”

You have to play baseball, and tell everyone about the birdies.” Then the person in the bright light kissed him and waved bye-bye. Then whoosh, the big sound came and they went into the clouds.”

The story went on for an hour. He taught us that “birdies” were always with us, but we don’t see them because we look with our eyes and we don’t hear them because we listen with our ears. But they are always there, you can only see them in here (he put his hand over his heart). They whisper the things to help us to do what is right because they love us so much. Brian continued, stating, “I have a plan, Mommy. You have a plan. Daddy has a plan. Everyone has a plan. We must all live our plan and keep our promises.

The “birdies help us to do that cause they love us so much.” In the weeks that followed, he often came to us and told all, or part of it again and again.

Always the story remained the same. The details were never changed or out of order. A few times he added further bits of information and clarified the message he had already delivered. It never ceased to amaze us how he could tell such detail and speak beyond his ability when he spoke of his “birdies.”

Everywhere he went, he told strangers about the “birdies”. Surprisingly, no one ever looked at him strangely when he did this. Rather, they always get a softened look on their face and smiled.

Needless to say, we have not been the same ever since that day, and I pray we never will be.

Author: Bob Richards
Source: Unknown


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Order in Chaos

Order in Chaos

Group Size: 8 or more
Time: 30 minutes.

Applications: Bridging Gaps, Communication, Active-Passive roles, group dynamics.

Materials
1. One number for each participant. Do not give the participants consecutive numbers. Skip around a little. Do not have a pattern. For example 1,2,3,4,5,8,9,11,14,17,19,20. You must always have a ‘1’ and the number that represents the number of participants in the activity.
2. One blindfold for each participant. (Optional)

Instructions
1. Create a clear space in a large area. Ensure that any dangerous objects or corners are shielded by someone so that people do not accidentally bump into them and injure themselves.
2. Give each participant a number written on a small piece of paper. They are not to share the number with anyone and are to put it away so that it cannot be seen.
3. Blindfold each participant or have them keep their eyes tightly shut.

4. Ask for questions. Ready, set, go!

Objective
The group must line themselves up in numeric order without talking or peeking.

1. After some time, tell the group that there are some missing numbers.
2. When the group believes they are in order ask them to call out their numbers as you go down the row and tap them on their shoulders. If they are correct then congratulate them. If they are incorrect ask them if they think they can fix it and allow them time to do so.

Debrief
1. What happened?

2. What communication strategies were used?

3. What difficulties did you face?

4. How did you overcome the difficulties?

5. How did you feel when you discovered some numbers were missing?

6. How did you change your strategy in light of this new information?

7. What does this game mean to you?

Facilitator Notes
1. People will find creative ways to communicate, but will become frustrated as the communication is less than perfect.

2. Additional frustration will occur when participants are unable to find the missing numbers. Some will give up. Some will find a place and then help sift others to the left or right depending on whether they are greater or lesser than the number they have.

3. Some will stand around waiting for someone else to help them find their place.

4. Some will take a leadership role and help others find their place.

5. Some will only be interested in finding the exact number to their left and right.

KEY APPLICATION: Bridging the Gaps
What do you do when faced with a gap in real life? When a task is left undone? When a person fails to do his/her part? When a vital piece of information is missing? There are two common responses: People will either step up or step back. They will step up and take responsibility to get the job done or they will step back and wait for someone else to do the job or until all the pieces are in place.

Business
When you are not given all the information you need to complete your job, how do you respond? When a series of jobs are related and someone fails to do his/her part? Are there times in business or in the workplace when you have to learn new ways to communicate? When there are gaps in communication? What lessons can this game teach us for dealing with these situations?

Personal
What do you do when your goals, objectives, dreams are not yet achievable because some piece of the puzzle is missing? When all the pieces don’t line up yet? Do you wait for something to happen or do you bridge the gaps? How do we know when to wait on God to position things and when to take action even if everything is not in place? How do you find your place in life? How do you become sure of your place in life?

Spiritual
What is your response when your spiritual direction is unclear? When God’s plan for your life seems to be missing critical pieces? Do you wait or do you respond to the limited knowledge you have been given? Do you believe God has a place for each of us in the body of Christ? How can you be sure of your place in life? How can you help others find their place?

Relationships
Are there times in relationships when you have to learn new ways to communicate? Are there gaps in communication? How do we overcome these gaps? Do you passively step back and wait for the other person to bridge the gaps or do you step up and take a proactive role to bridge them? What lessons can this game teach us for dealing with relationships?

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Pearls

“Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:18, niv).

Into the shell of an oyster a tiny grain of sand finds its way. The intruder, though small, is a source of irritation and pain to the soft body of the oyster. Unable to rid itself of the unwelcome pebble, the oyster seeks to reduce the irritation by coating it with layers of soft, iridescent mother-of-pearl material from its own shell. Over time, the oyster transforms a painful irritation into a beautiful pearl of great value.

Most of us have irritations, “grains of sand”, or annoying “pebbles” that come into our life on a regular basis … many of which can be very frustrating and even painful.

But every one of these annoyances gives us a chance to grow. Some will require great patience, others tough love. Some will require our turning the other cheek, some confrontation, and some kindness and understanding. For example, addicts need to be treated with tough love. Bullies require us to maintain healthy boundaries. Cheaters need to be confronted. Manipulators need to be managed. Control freaks need to be resisted, guilt throwers need to be challenged, and toxic people may need to be avoided, and so on.

With God’s help, if we so choose, we can turn every one of these annoying pebbles into pearls or we can allow them to make us bitter. For it’s not what happens to us that matters, but how we react to what happens. What we do about it is what matters—and that’s a choice we make either consciously or unconsciously.

A pearl is a victory over a problem. Problems have value. We grow and mature in the midst of difficulties. We learn skills for life. Every irritation that comes into our lives is an opportunity for a pearl culture. The more
irritations, the greater the number of pearls we may possess. All one has to do is welcome the problem, perceive it as an educational experience, and cover it with love, the most precious part of us. Irritations will be smoothed out.
You’ll be richer for peacefully handling your problems.

Ask God, to help you see an opportunity for growth in every annoying situation.


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How to have Revival

If all the sleeping folk will wake up,
If all the lukewarm folk will fire up,
If all the dishonest folk will confess up,
If all the disgruntled folk will cheer up,
If all the depressed folk will cheer up,
If all the estranged folk will make up,
If all the gossipers will shut up,
If all true soldiers will stand up,
If all the dry bones will shake up,
If all the church members will pray up…
Then we can have a revival!

–R. G. Lee

The Lord’s Baseball Game

Bob and the Lord stood by to observe a baseball game. The Lord’s team was playing Satan’s team. The Lord’s team was at bat, the score was tied zero to zero, and it was the bottom of the 9th inning with two outs.

They continued to watch as a batter stepped up to the plate whose name was Love. Love swung at the first pitch and hit a single, because Love never fails.

The next batter was named Faith, who also got a single because Faith works with Love.

The next batter up was named Godly wisdom. Satan wound up and threw the first pitch. Godly Wisdom looked it over and let it pass: Ball one. Three more pitches and Godly Wisdom walked, because Godly wisdom never swings at what Satan throws. The bases were loaded.

The Lord then turned to Bob and told him He was now going to bring in His star player. Up to the plate stepped Grace. Bob said, “He sure doesn’t look like much!” Satan’s whole team relaxed when they saw Grace. Thinking he had won the game, Satan wound up and fired his first pitch. To the shock of everyone, Grace hit the ball harder than anyone had ever seen.

But Satan was not worried; his center fielder let very few get by. He went up for the ball, but it went right through his glove, hit him on the head and sent him crashing on the ground; then it continued over the fence for a home run! The Lord’s team won.

The Lord then asked Bob if he knew why Love, Faith, and Godly Wisdom could get on base but could not win the game. Bob answered that he did not know why.

The Lord explained,” If your love, faith and wisdom had won the game you would think you had done it by yourself. Love, faith and wisdom will get you on base, but only My Grace can get you home.”


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Profiles

Materials

  • Pieces of white paper. (Almost any white paper will work: butcher paper, Mah Jong paper, posterboard, white tissue paper, even newsprint classified ads).
  • Charcoal or a dark crayon
  • Bright light.

Icebreaker Description
In this icebreaker / crowdbreaker, youth will try to guess the identity of other youth by looking at their profiles.

Preparation
Set up the bright light so that it shines against a wall where you can place the pieces of paper. You will also need someone who can use the crayon or charcoal to follow the edge of the shadow projected onto the paper. Someone with some artistic ability is useful but not necessary.

Icebreaker Activity

  1. As each guest arrives he is taken into a room and asked to stand between a strong light and a smooth wall. Then the person drawing outlines the profile with a crayon or charcoal – outlining only the head.
  2. Be careful to write the name of each subject on the back of the drawing.
  3. When all guests have arrived the profiles are held up to see who can recognise the most people from the profiles.
  4. Show the profiles 1 at a time. Youth can make a numbered list and put the suspected person’s name beside each number.

Optional Debrief

  • How were you able to recognise the profiles?
  • What were some of the distinguishing characteristics that helped?

Optional Conclusion
In Scripture we are told that Jesus was the image of the Father. He was fully God and fully man. When you looked at Him you saw God. When He acted, He acted as God the Father. Many did not recognise Him as God because they focused on his physical form. Yet even though his physical form was different there were many things that revealed who he was. We are also to reveal God/ Jesus in our lives. What are some ways we can do this?

Application

  • As Jesus revealed the father through his words, deeds, actions, heart, etc., do your actions reveal God as your father?
  • Do your actions, thoughts, words, deeds, and heart reveal Christ in you or your old self more clearly?
  • What is something you need to put off to more clearly reveal the image of Christ in your life this week?

Scripture

  • Colossians 1:15 – Jesus was the image of God
  • Colossians 3:10 – we are to put on the image of Christ
  • John 14:9-12 – Whoever has seen Christ has seen the Father

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The Vessel

The Master was searching for a vessel to use:
Before Him were many,
Which one would He choose?
“Take me,” cried the gold one.
“I’m shiny and bright;
I’m of great value and I do things just right.
My beauty and luster will outshine the rest,
And for someone like you, Master, Gold would be best.”
The Master passed on with no word at all,
And looked at a silver urn, grand and tall.
“I’ll serve you dear Master, I’ll pour out your wine;
I’ll be on your table whenever you dine.
My lines are so graceful, my carving so true,
And silver will always complement you.”
Unheeding, the Master passed on to the brass,
Wide-mouthed and shallow and polished like glass.
“Here, here!” cried the vessel, “I know I will do;
Place me on your table for all men to view.”
“Look at me,” called the goblet of crystal so clear,
“My transparency shows my contents so dear.
Though fragile am I, I will serve you with pride,
And I’m sure I’ll be happy in your house to abide.”
Then the Master came next to a vessel of wood;
Polished and carved, it solidly stood.
“You may use me, dearest Master,” the wooden bowl said.
“But I’d rather you used me for fruit, not for bread.”
Then the Master looked down and saw a vessel of clay.
Empty and broken it helplessly lay.
No hope had the vessel that the Master might choose,
To cleanse, and make whole, to fill and to use.
“Ah! Now This is the vessel I’ve been hoping to find.
I’ll mend it and use it and make it all mine.
I need not the vessel with pride of itself,
Nor one that is narrow to sit on the shelf;
Nor one that is big-mouthed and shallow and loud;
Nor one that displays his contents so proud;
Nor the one who thinks he can do things just right;
But this plain earthen vessel filled with power and might.”
Then gently He lifted the vessel of clay,
Mended and cleansed it and filled it that day;
Spoke to it kindly – “There’s work you must do…
Just pour out to others as I pour into you.”

B.V. Cornwall


MORE IDEAS? See “Creative Object Lessons”

200 page e-book that explains everything you need to know when planning your very own object lessons. It contains 90 fully developed object lesson ideas and another 200 object lesson starter ideas based on Biblical idioms and Names / Descriptions of God.

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Family Treasure

A family had a very beautiful vase that was a family heirloom. Their little girl had been told that “it is our family treasure.” One day there was a loud crash. The little girl began to wail. Her mother ran into the room and found her daughter crying and the vase broken. She asked her daughter, “what is wrong?”. “I broke the family treasure”, she cried. Her mother picked her up and said, “Yes, but you are alright.” When the girl became a woman she said, “I found out that day that I was the real family treasure.

Did Jesus Use a Modem at the Sermon on the Mount?

Did Jesus use a modem,
At the Sermon on the Mount?
Did He ever try a broadcast fax,
To send His message out?
Did the disciples carry beepers,
As they went about their route?
Did Jesus use a modem,
At the Sermon on the Mount?

Did Paul use a Laptop,
With lots of RAM and ROM?
Were his letters posted on a BBS,
At Paul.Rome.Com?
Did the man from Macedonia,
Send an E-Mail saying “Come?”
Did Paul use a Laptop,
With lots of RAM and ROM?

Did Moses use a joystick,
At the parting of the Sea?
And a Satellite Guidance Tracking System,
To show him where to be?
Did he write the law on tablets,
Or are they really on CD?
Did Moses use a joystick,
At the parting of the Sea?

Did Jesus really die for us,
One day upon a tree?
Or was it just a Hologram,
Or Technical Wizardry?
Can you download the Live Action Video Clip,
To play on your PC?
Did Jesus really die for us,
One day upon a tree?

Have the wonders of this modern age,
Made you question what is true?
How a single man, in a simple time,
Could offer life anew?
How a sinless life, a cruel death,
Then a glorious life again,
Could offer more to a desperate world,
Than all the inventions of man?

If in your life, the voice of God,
Is sometimes hard to hear.
With other voices calling,
His doesn’t touch your ear.
Then set aside your laptop and modem,
And all your fancy gear.
And open your Bible, open your heart,
And let your Father draw near.

Author: Ellis Bush
e-mail: ellisbush@compuserve.com

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