Two Penguins

A priest was driving down the freeway with two penguins sitting in the back seat of his car. A police officer pulled the priest over for speeding & upon seeing the penguins said to the priest “what do you think you’re doing with those penguins, take them to the zoo right away.” The officer then let the priest go with …

Family Tree

Materials
None

Icebreaker Description
In this icebreaker / crowdbreaker, youth will refer to each other by famous personalities in their fictional family trees

Preparation
None

Icebreaker Activity

  1. Form pairs of group members not related to each other.
  2. Then have each pair create a fictional family tree that shows how the partners really are long-lost relatives descended from a famous ancestor

Texas Farmer in Australia

kangaroo.jpgA Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The …

A Whale of a Tale

I. God says “effect”, Jonah says “defect.” (1:1-3)
Looking at Jonah.

1. Why did God send Jonah to Ninevah?
a. for a vacation.
b. so Jonah could get away from his family
c. God had something for him to accomplish
d. To test Jonah’s obedience
e. To punish Jonah’s disobedience
f. Jonah had some free time to waste.
g. God …

When We Stop

gods_psychiatry.jpg“One morning as I was hurriedly dressing to begin a full and thrilling day I felt pain in my back. I mentioned it to my wife but was sure it would soon pass away. However, she insisted I see a physician, and he put me in a hospital.

In the hospital I was very unhappy. I had no time to …

Top 15 Biblical Ways to Get a Wife

  • Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home, shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new clothes. Then she’s yours. – (Deuteronomy 21:11-13)
  • Find a prostitute and marry her. – (Hosea 1:1-3)
  • Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by watering his flock – Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)
  • Purchase a piece of property, and get a

Five Finger Prayer

  1. hand.jpgYour thumb is nearest to you. So begin your prayers by praying for those closest to you. They are the easiest to remember. To pray for our loved ones is, as C.S. Lewis once said, a “sweet duty.”
  2. The next finger is the pointing finger. Pray for those who teach, instruct and heal. This includes teachers, doctors, and ministers. They

Letter from Camp

Dear Mom & Dad:

We are having a great time here at Lake Typhoid. Scoutmaster Webb is making us all write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried. We are OK. Only 1 of our tents and 2 sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up …

Where is God?

In a certain suburban neighborhood, there were two brothers, 8 and 10 years old, who were exceedingly mischievous. Whenever something went wrong in the neighborhood, it turned out they had a hand in it.

Their parents were at their wits’ end trying to control them. Hearing about a minister nearby who worked with delinquent boys, the mother suggested to the …

Freedom and Security

After the Western ideal of unlimited freedom, after the Marxist concept of freedom as acceptance of the yoke of necessity—here is the true Christian definition of freedom. Freedom is self-restriction! Restriction of the self for the sake of others!

-Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn…