Category Archives: Youth Ministry

Youth Ministry: Resources, ideas and training to help you become more effective in your work with youth.

Youth in 1982 vs 2012

Description

Interesting look at the differences between youth in 1982 and youth today. I was a youth and graduated from High School in 1984 so interesting to see the differences between my generation and today’s generation of youth.

Then vs Now: How Things Have Changed from 1982 to 2012


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Parent Support

The REAL Night Before Christmas
(By Parents)

‘Twas the night before Christmas
when all through the house
I searched for the tools
to hand to my spouse
Instructions were studied
and we were inspired,
in hopes we could manage
“Some Assembly Required.”

The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,
while Dad and I faced the evening with dread:
a kitchen, two bikes, Barbie’s townhouse to boot!
And now, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!

We opened the boxes, my heart skipped a beat –
let no parts be missing or parts incomplete!
Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;
if we can’t get it right, it goes straight to the basement!

When what to my worrying eyes should appear
but 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear,
With each part numbered and every slot named,
so if we failed, only we could be blamed.

More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,
all over the carpet they were scattered about.
“Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!
Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!
Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand.”
“Honey,” said hubby, “you just glued my hand.”

And then in a twinkling, I knew for a fact
that all the toy dealers had indeed made a pact
to keep parents busy all Christmas Eve night
with “assembly required” till morning’s first light.

We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,
till our eyes, they went blurry; our fingers all hurt.
The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thin
before we attached the last rod and last pin.
Then laying the tools away in the chest,
we fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.

But I said to my husband just before I passed out,
“This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.
Tomorrow we’ll cheer, let the holiday ring,
and not run to the store for one single thing!
We did it! We did it! The toys are all set
for the perfect, most magical, Christmas, I bet!”

Then off to dreamland and sweet repose
I gratefully went, though I suppose
there’s something to say for those self-deluded-
I’d forgotten that BATTERIES are never included!

 


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THINK Before You Speak to Youth

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Our words are very powerful, especially when speaking to youth who are forming their sense of identity and self-worth. They have the power to build up, and to tear down, the power to inspire and to dishearten, the power to encourage or discourage. Whether you are a parent, a teacher, a youth minister, or just a friend of youth here are 5 simple things to consider.

The next time you want to say something to a youth, T.H.I.N.K. first.

Before you say something you might regret, ask yourself these 5 simple questions. If the answer is “No” to any one of these questions, then you might not want to say it to a youth. Teens are very sensitive to the words we say. The following scriptures have had general references to people replaced with the word “youth” or a variation to bring more focus to our conversations with those who are youths.

1. TRUE? – Is it true?

  • Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of respect, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if something is excellent or praiseworthy, in reference to youth, think about these things. (Philippians 4:8)
  • Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. (Proverbs 12:19)

2. HELPFUL? – Is it helpful?

  • Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building youth up according to their needs, that it may benefit the teens who listen. (Ephesians 4:29)

3. INSPIRING? – Is it inspiring?

  • But encourage teenagers daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness (Hebrews 3:13)
  • Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur youth on toward love and good deeds. (Hebrews 10:23-24)

4. NECESSARY? – Is it necessary?

  • Walk in wisdom toward youth, redeeming the time. Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each teenager. (Ephesians 4:5-6)
  • But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken to youth. (Matthew 12:36)

5. KIND? – Is it Kind?

  • Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice toward youth. (Ephesians 4:31)
  • He who loves a pure heart and whose speech is gracious will have the king for his friend. (Proverbs 22:11)
  • Instead, speaking the truth to teens in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. (Ephesians 4:15)

Another way to look at this is to consider how to reword what you have to say to teenagers so that it fits these 5 guidelines. So the next time, before you say something to a youth, THINK first!


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Shrek Themed Birthday Party

shrek.jpgDescription
In every youth group, there will be opportunities to celebrate the birthdays of your teens. Here is a Birthday Party theme with one of my favorite animated characters.

Decoration Ideas

  • Poster board cut and decorated to look like castle windows.
  • A poster on the Door saying: Welcome to the land of Far Far Away
  • Cut out poster board to look like Shrek and Fiona’s carriage (garlic clove of Garlic).
  • Shrek soft toys and plushies.
  • Cover your table with a bright yellow table cloth. Scatter green sequins all around the top. – Run strips of green and purple streamers down the center to create a table runner.
  • If your party is for younger youth or children, build a castle using a large appliance box and small boxes on-top. Cut a door and windows. Paint the entire castle with gray paint. Alternatively, decorate the box to look like a tree stump with windows. The children can use this for playtime and you’ll be able to keep it for your lucky birthday child! And it’s a great decoration for a youth party too!

 

Party Hat Ideas
Greet Everyone at the door with their very own pair of Ogre Ears.

Materials

    • Large sheets of light and dark green Craft Foam or construction paper.
  • Craft glue or a hot glue gun.
  • Headbands

 

Instructions

  1. Cut two shrek ears and two small triangles for the inside of the ears.
  2. Attach the small triangles to the ears with a glue gun.
  3. Then attach the ears to the head band with the glue gun.

 

Food Ideas:

  • Ginger Bread Man Cookies
  • Roasted Turkey Legs
  • Roasted Garlic Cloves
  • “Worms” in red swamp mud (Spaghetti Bolognese)
  • Soda with green food coloring

 

Game Ideas:
Pin the Wings on the Donkey

  • Just like Pin the Tail on the Donkey, but you’ll need to make wings with construction paper or craft foam sheets.
  • Enlist an artistic teen to draw a Donkey on poster board … they are much cuter that the donkey in the traditional game.

 

Prince Charming Tag

  • Designate a Prince Charming. That player will wear a crown.
  • When you say go…the guests will try to catch the Prince.To make it more difficult for youth, blindfold them and have prince charming quote lines from the movie. Youth follow the voice and try to tag prince charming.

 

Cupcake Walk

  • Let youth draw and color a picture of their favorite Shrek character on squares of heavy paper.
  • Tape the squares to the floor in a circle, using one fewer than the number of participants.
  • The birthday youth gets to start and stop the music at appropriate times during the game.
  • When the music starts, like in the traditional musical chairs, the teens walk from square to square.
  • When the music stops, the youth left without a square is out of the game but gets a cupcake.
  • Play continues until one player is left.
  • Award a prize to the winner, along with a tasty cupcake.

A Healthy Spiritual Heart for Youth

As a youth, we need to ask God for:

  1. A LEARNER’S HEART
    • Learn for God’s glory, your edification, and the furtherance of the Gospel.
    • To know, knowledge are used at least 51 times in Proverbs.
    • Weigh all learning through the knowledge of Jesus Christ (II Peter 3:18).
  2. AN UNDERSTANDING HEART – 65 times in Proverbs
    • To be able to interpret what you learn (above) in God’s perspective (Proverbs 2:10,11).
    • To be able to understand yourself first (Proverbs 4:7-9) and then others.
  3. AN HONEST, TRANSPARENT HEART
    • What you can’t understand (above), share with the person giving you the real or imagined problem (Matthew 5:23,24).
  4. A PURE HEART
    • In an increasingly amoral world we must flee youthful lusts (II Timothy 2:22).
    • Young men and women overcome by letting God’s Word live within (I John 2:14).
    • Don’t be a loner – go out two by two (Mark 6:7).
  5. A DISCRETIONARY HEART – in Word and in Deed
    • To know the difference between that which unnecessarily offends and the inoffensive (Proverbs 2:11).
    • Lord, help me not to be a stumbling block to younger Christians (I Corinthians 8).
  6. A RESPECTFUL HEART
    • You may not agree with or understand someone, but respect him for his work’s sake (I Thessalonians 5:12).
    • Notice in I Timothy 5:1,2 the intricate relationships that young Timothy must observe.
  7. A DISCIPLINED HEART
    • One that chooses against oneself in all matters great or small (Luke 9:23). What you are will be your message (II Corinthians 3:2,3):
  8. A SERVANT’S ALERT HEART
    • Become a load-lifter. Anticipate what would be helpful and then do it. Study the greatest servant in all of history, Jesus Christ (Mark 10:42-45).
  9. A COMMUNICATING HEART
    • This is the counterbalance to merely “being a good example.” Communicate by word, the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ.
    • Acts uses words like witness, teach, tell, proclaim, etc., 113 times or an average of four per chapter.
    • Your personal testimony, backed by God’s Word are your greatest weapons (Revelation 12:11).
  10. A PRAISING, THANKFUL HEART
    • If you learn this through loneliness, problems, misunderstandings – you will be A-OK with God.
    • In everything give thanks (I Thessalonians 5:18; Ephesians 5:20; Hebrews 13:15):

 


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7 Key Questions Youth Ministers Should Ask Everyday

  • Why?
    Key: Discover the root cause.

    Life is cause and effect. Actions give you your results. This applies to not only what we do, but to what others do as well. It applies in church, in youth ministry, in your job, and in your personal life. Try to see things through the eyes of the Bible, through the eyes of God, through the eyes of another person to discover the root causes. And remember Isaiah 55:8 – Sometimes we simply don’t know. But ti still never hurts to ask why and you might discover some missing piece, a small change, a different perspective that can change your outcomes.
  • What did I learn?
    Key to progress

    What can you learn about God, about yourself, about others, about your church, about your youth ministry, about the youth as indiciduals. Life is full of lessons about God, about human nature, regarding our own self-knowledge. Mistakes are made, misunderstandings occur, plans fail, but at the same time, success can be repeated, opportunities can be discovered, possibilities can be explored if we can find a lesson to grow from.
  • How can I help you?
    Focus on the needs of others

    It’s easy to get distracted from the real reason we are in youth ministry and focus on events, results, rules, traditions and ourselves rather than focus on the needs of other people. Our ministry is not just to our youth, but to our families, to the church, to church leaders, to our colleagues, to parents, and to our volunteer workers. When we focus on the needs of others and that they are special creations of God, created with a purpose it can make a world of difference. Sometimes we have to see people not for what they are now, but for what they can be through the grace of God and playing whatever part God give to us to nurture that growth in Christ.
  • What if?
    Free your creativity, new possibilities

    A small change in perspective can make a big difference. Many of the conveniences of todays world came about because someone asked “What if?” Instead of looking at impossibilities, explore the possibilities. With God anything is possible. Instead of seeing difficulties, look for opportunities. Instead of seeing struggles, see opportunities for growth. Focus on solutions and you will find them.
  • How can this be improved?
    Take your results to a new level

    Even success can be tweaked for greater success. Contentment is often the precursor to failure. You will only grow as big as your dreams. When you trust God with things that are bigger than you, you’ll find that he is bigger than any success or failure. Step out in faith for even bigger things the next time around!
  • How can I show my gratitude?
    Thankfulness is key to long-term happiness

    We know that all good things come from God. There is a light at the end of every tunnel. There is an opportunity in every difficulty. When everything is great, it is because God has blessed. Give thanks in all things. Whatever we focus on grows bigger in our thoughts. Success is getting what you hoped for, but happiness is found in being thankful to God for what you have.
  • What is the best use of my time now?
    Refocus on what’s most important,

    There are never enough hours in a day to do what needs to be done in your youth ministry or church. But God doesn’t call us to be solely responsible. Each member of the youth group, of the church is a part of the Body of Christ and God divides the work among us. God gives every one of his children a piece of the load of ministry to carry. Just pick up your piece and trust God to deliver the rest.


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17 Places to Find Potential Leaders for Your Youth Ministry

For most youth ministries, the summer months are very busy. A lot of youth ministers are conducting summer camps, organizing youth retreats, leading mission trips, and taking youth on special outings. No youth leader can do it alone and even if you are one of those who think you can do it alone, don’t.

Youth Pastors Need to Build a Youth Ministry Team

Building up a committed team of leaders and helpers for youth ministry will provide you valuable insights, additional talents, and more eyes, hands and footwork to keep the youth program running smoothly. As you invest in leaders it also develops shared ownership of the youth program that insures it continues effectively for many years to come even if you move on to a different church or ministry yourself.

Here are just a few of the benefits of building a youth ministry team:

Communication
When parents and church leaders are part of the team and understand the goals and programs, it makes it so much easier to communicate those goals to the congregation as well as avoid misunderstandings.

Commitment
Involvement generates commitment. When people see themselves as stakeholders in the ministry, they tend to be more committed to making it successful.

Care
It’s much easier for a group of people to attend to the varied and sometimes overwhelming needs of youth and show care on a much more personal level than for a single youth leader trying to care for a large youth group. For youth, time is important and the larger the youth group, the less time you will have for individuals in the group.

So how can you get started building a youth ministry team?

In the book, “Good to Great” by Jim Collins, he explains several powerful ideas for any company or organization. One of those principles is very appropriate for youth ministry “Get the right people on the bus, the wrong people off the bus, and the right people in the right seats – then figure out where to drive it.” Getting the right team in the right roles is the most important part of building a youth ministry team.

Here are 17 places to find potential youth leaders for your youth ministry team.

1. Surveys
Conduct a Talent / Interest Surveys for the entire congregation. Have the various roles and responsibilities for all church ministries listed. When new people join he church as members, also ask them to fill out Talent/ Interest Surveys. You’ll want to get to know them and observe their Christian walk and commitment over time, but that is true of anyone you consider for a youth ministry role.

2. Committed Church Members
Ask currently active Bible Study or Sunday school members to become youth leaders. Ask current cell group members to become youth leaders. People who are already committed to the church often make great additions to the youth ministry team.

3. Ask for Recommendations
Ask the current youth leaders to recommend Potential Leaders from the congregation. Chances are, the youth leaders you have now also know other friends in the church who would be great leaders. You can also ask the teens in your church, “Who in the church do you think would make a great youth leader?” Youth are very aware of the people in the church who already make them feel welcome and loved. Ask Sunday school members (Or Bible Study Leaders) to recommend potential leaders. They are very aware of those in their studies and classes that have a mature or growing faith that would be great Bible Teachers or Sunday School Teachers. Additionally, ask the current church leadership to recommend potential youth leaders. Their circle of relationships may include many people that are not too familiar to you, but who would make great leaders. Don’t forget to ask deacons or elders in addition to the other pastoral leaders.

4. Existing Short term Programs
One of these is Vacation Bible School. Many churches hold these programs for children in the church. It’s a short commitment and usually gets a lot of volunteers. Some of those working with the older children might make great youth leaders as well.

5. Previous Leaders
Many people serve in leadership positions and then at times take break due to family or work commitments and other various reasons. In time they are often willing to jump back into a ministry position if asked.

6. Committed people who aren’t already doing something. 
It sometimes seem that there are the few same people in the church doing all the work. Ministry leaders see their commitment and talents and give them more to do. But sometimes, there are others who aren’t really ambitious enough to volunteer who just need a little nudge to get them involved. It’s much easier to teach a committed member a few skills in ministering to youth than to teach commitment to someone who has the interest but lacks the commitment.

7. Existing Lists
Take out the Church membership roll, the Sunday School Rosters, Cell group rosters, participant lists in various church training programs and ministry opportunities and read through the names. If you just try to list form your own memory you will miss many of the precious souls who are often present, but not foremost in your thoughts. Many of these are valuable gems simply waiting to be shaped and polished!

8. Returning Church Members
Previous students who have gone off to college and come back for a summer break or having completed their college education often make excellent youth leaders. They may need a little more guidance but they make up for the lack of experience with an abundance of energy. Returning servicemen and women also make great youth leaders. They typically are very disciplined and work very hard.

9. Persons attending training conferences and conventions
The fact that these people are taking the extra effort to grow and mature their faith makes them good candidates for potential youth positions. It may also reflect a more flexible schedule that is helpful when serving youth.

10. Training Courses
Offer a training course for youth workers, parents, or anyone else that wants to better understand youth. Those that attend the course obviously must have an interest and some of them might make great additions to your youth ministry team. You can offer general leadership classes or potential Teacher classes etc. as well.

11. People in administrative positions
Members often serve in administrative positions because they want to contribute but are not yet ready to take a ministry role. For many this is the first step into ministry and once they gain confidence and understanding they are ready to move on to something more hands on.

12. People who work with youth outside the church
Coaches, school teachers, school administrators and many other people work with youth outside the church. Some of them may be looking for church to be a break away from the routine work with youth. But there are still others who would welcome the opportunity to minister to you at church and youth functions.

13. People who are Leaders in their Careers
There are business men and women in every church whose work requires leadership skills. They can be leaders in a variety of situations. There may also be others who are leaders in the community as well. Give them an opportunity to be spiritual leaders to your teens.

14. People with Free time
Retired Persons often have lots of time and wisdom to contribute to any youth program. They may not have the energy but they certainly have lots of love and affection. You can often find meaningful roles for them in your youth program. Some examples might be writing personal postcards, praying for youth, and for those with a bit more energy and mobility can often put their younger counterparts to shame in serving God.

15. New Church Members
When people transfer from another church, their churches may highlight their previous service as part of the recommendation or transfer of membership. Nurturing new members in a New Members class also should include some teaching on discovering gifts and finding places of service in the church.

16. Contributors to the Youth Ministry
There are often people in the church that contribute to the youth ministry by providing transport, food, places for meetings, or even money. It is such people that provide a backbone for many of the youth groups. Even so, some might be willing to become a little more personally involved if asked.

17. Parents
It’s rare that a parent makes a good youth leader in the church if that role is serving over his or her own teens. During adolescence, teens start looking for significant role models outside the immediate family. Teenage years can also be turbulent and emotionally charged, thus church can be an oasis away from that trouble. If both teen and parent are ok with it, it works out fantastic. Biblical responsibility for raising Godly men and women, after all, rests with the parents. But for many parents and youth, this simply isn’t going to be a god idea yet. But there are often other leadership roles with a different class or age group, which are very suitable even when a parent has teens in the youth program.

A Final Note
I wanted to give you 10 places to find youth leaders and help for your youth ministry, but as I started writing more ideas came to mind. Simply remember, we are one body of Christ with many parts and we are all different but also all needed. Pray for God’s guidance to show you those to approach and that he would steer their hearts toward places to serve in your ministry. Personally, I believe that there is a place for everyone in the church. We just need to get the right people into the right seats and let God do the driving on our journey heavenward!

Have more ideas? Why not share them in the comments below. Where do you go to find leaders for youth youth ministry team?


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Youth Self-Image: Primary Influences

Self-Esteem and Self-Image are issues that all youth have to address. During the teenage years, the primary developmental task for youth is discovering their identity, their life purpose, their mission in this world. Youth are asking the question, “Who am I?” and “Why am I here?”

One step to helping your church youth deal with these critical questions is in understanding some of the primary issues that influence a young person’s self-esteem or self-image.

Here are seven primary factors that effect a youth’s self-image.

1. Age that Youth Physically Mature
Youth progress to different stages of maturity at different speeds. Guys tend to be a little behind the girls in maturity, but every youth is different and growing and maturing at a different rate. In relation to their peers, there will always be some youth that are a little behind their peers and some that are a little ahead. Interestingly this is often tied to their physical maturity. If they mature physically earlier than their peers, because they look more like adults, people often treat them more like adults and these youth tend to generally develop a fairly positive self-image. Youth who mature physically a little later than their peers, still look more like children and are treated by adults as children. These youth who mature a little later often feel misunderstood and more likely to have negative self image and maladjusted behavior.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Don’t treat youth differently based on physical maturity. Treat everyone of a specific age group the same as mush as possible, both in leadership responsibilities as well as in other interactions. Don’t single out those who are a little behind in physical maturity, not give all the leadership and responsibilities to those who are more mature.

2. Physical Appearance
Youth are very peer conscious. They are always comparing themselves to their peers. While some may strive to be different, most prefer to hide in the crowd, to blend in with their peers. For most youth, If they look different from their peers they see themselves as being strange and potentially inferior. This is especially true for the primary sexual characteristics such as body hair, breast development in the girls and muscle and genital development in the guys. Even if they are more attractive because of their male physique or feminine curves it can still lead to a poor self-image simply because they see themselves as different from their peers. Physical differences such as a large nose, or bigger than usual ears or even being too thin or simply a little bigger than their peers can lead to inferiority issues. When it is a physical defect or even simple things like acne or rashes it can still have a negative impact on their self-image. The more embarrassing or unusual he difference, the greater the impact.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Do not draw attention to physical differences among youth, especially if it is something that could lead to embarrassment of any kind. Try to avoid activities that highlight the differences and always be affirming to youth regarding their appearance.

3. Sex-Appropriateness
Sex-appropriate characteristics are essential for a healthy self-esteem among youth. This includes appearance, interests, and behavior. Guys that appear a little more effeminate and girls that appear too masculine tend to have problems in self-estem. Youth have nicknames for them such as a “sissy” for a less masculine guy and “tom-boy” for a less feminine girl. Some youth have more trouble forming a healthy self-image if they aspire to occupations that tend to be dominated by the opposite sex. For example, hair dressers are often seen as a woman’s job and construction work is often seen as a man’s job. Finally there might be specific mannerisms and interests that again are commonly associated with the opposite sex. These can also be hurdles for them to overcome in developing a positive self-image.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Try not to reinforce stereotypes for jobs and behaviors. Avoid masculine / feminine comparisons and instead treat everyone as brothers and sisters in Christ. Always affirm youth for who they are and for what they do as an individual rather than as simply a guy or a girl. Always try to include sports and activities that balance out the need for both guys and girls on each team. Always try to have a variety of positive role models serving within your youth ministry team including singles, couples, and people from a variety of occupations and walks of life.

4. Names and Nicknames
Youth are sensitive and embarrassed if their peers judge a nickname unfavorably or if they are given nicknames that are meant or even implies ridicule. Nicknames can often stick with a person for life.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Nicknames and labels are to be avoided at all costs as they tend to highlight the negative. If you hear a youth using negative labels or nicknames, encourage them to use more positive ones. Set the example yourself by using positive labels that affirm the positive qualities in each youth.

5. Family Relationships
Teens who have very close relationships with a particular family member will identify most closely
with this person. As such, they tend to desire similar personality traits. This can be positive or negative. They say that if you want to know how a guy will treat his wife, look at how he treats his mother. If you want to know how a girl will treat a future husband, look at how they treat their father. At the same time, this desire to be like the most-liked parent can be detrimental if it goes over the line of causing sexually ambiguous behavior and characteristics. Lack of positive family relationships and positive role models can also cause problems for youth regarding their self-image.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Have a variety of role models serving on your youth ministry team. Singles, dating couples, young couples, couples with children, couples with teens, and couples that have been married for a long time all help youth in affirming their own identities and coming to a positive self-image. Provide opportunities for youth to form significant bonds with others outside their immediate family. This gives them a broader perspective on things to appreciate in their own families as well as helps them to have a variety of models in choosing how they will develop their own relationships and their own identity in those relationships.

6. Peers
Peers place a primary role in the identity formation of youth. During the teen years they start looking outside the immediately family for keys to their own identity. Peers influence a youth’s personality in two primary ways. First, what a youth believes about himself is often a reflection of what he perceives that his peers believe about him. Second, a youth is often under a lot of pressure to conform to the personality traits and behavior that is approved by his peers.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Try to create an environment with yourself, your volunteers and the rest of the youth that is affirming and supportive for the youth. While peer pressure can be negative, it can also be very positive. Affirm youth as leaders and who are good role models. Help to mentor those who need a little more help. Make affirmations and recognition a regular part of everything you do in youth ministry. And when possible, without embarrassing the youth, make that recognition public to the rest of the youth.

7. Level of Aspiration
Everyone has dreams and goals and aspirations. Youth are often asking the question, “Why am I here?” “What is my purpose in life?” “What is the meaning behind my existence?” But this is also a tricky area when it comes to youth with fragile self-esteem. They need to have big dreams and goals to drive them forward, but if the dreams are too big they can experience failure and great disappointment. Mistakes and failures, if not handled just right can lead to anxiety and feelings that they are not good enough or even the thought that “I am a failure.” At the same expectation that are too low leads to mediocrity and become without purpose, wandering through life without direction. It has been said that the bigger our dreams, the bigger we become. But also has a greater risk of failure. We need to help youth to be realistic in their aspirations, but at the same time not to be complacent to live only in their comfort zone. Youth who are realistic about his or her abilities will gain greater self-confidence with each success and, with it, a better self-concept.

Implications and Ideas for Youth Ministry
Always challenge youth to dream big but also be realistic dreams. Youth need champions in the youth ministry, people who will cheer them on in their dreams and support them and encourage them in both success and in failure.

By the way, this is not only useful for youth, but it’s great information for parents of youth to consider as well.

 


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Youth Issues 2011

At the start of 2011, I am always asking myself about being relevant to the youth of today. Society and culture is a moving target and if we are to be most effective as youth leaders we need to keep ourselves up to date on the issues that are faced by youth today. Even so I think there are some timeless general themes that every youth struggles with. Here are those on my list. Would love to hear your thoughts!

Ken

  1. Identity – Who am I and why am I here? – Identity as Christians, as a disciple, as a denomination, in relationships to parents, others, etc.
  2. Relationships – How should I interact with others? – relationship with God, with lost, with parents, with friends, with Christians, EQ, etc.
  3. Discipleship – How do I live as a Christian? – Christian disciplines, following Christ, mentoring others, what is means to be a disciple
  4. Decision Making – How should I choose? – Choices, temptation, God’s will, self discipline, career

While these are general themes, what specific themes do you think we need to address with our youth in 2011?

 


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Quick Simple Christmas Decoration Tips

When it comes to decorating for Christmas, some youth pastors find this to be one of the most difficult things to do. While there are some awesome Christmas decoration setups that people have created, they cost a bundle that not every youth budget can afford. Of course, even on a budget, you will still be able to host a youth Christmas party and have a setup that youth will end up talking about for a long time. The best ingredient for a Christmas Party is games and relationships, but you still want a to have a little bit of decorations to enhance the Christmas atmosphere.

Decorating the Snack Table
Chances are if you are hosting a youth party, you will be having a table spread of food. This is the perfect place to begin the decoration process. Find an inexpensive green table cloth to throw on it and accent it with a series of red candles. If your youth are a little wild, candles might be a little dangerous in which you might want to accent the table cloth with red cups, forks, napkins, etc. You can even simply tie a large ribbon and bow across the table (easily made from a strips of red cloth or even a red table cloth cut into strips, and make it look like a giant wrapped gift. This inexpensive and simple method is the perfect way to begin the Christmas decorations in your home or youth room.

Christmas Lights
Lights are also a very popular way of decorating for your youth Christmas party. You can place these twinkling lights around windows, the edges of a wall or just about anywhere at all. They will add the holiday feeling in a room and can get youth talking. While you are doing this, keep in mind that you should never put together more than 3 sets per plug.

Christmas Tree
The Christmas tree is another staple that will be essential in the space you are decorating. When you are looking for the perfect size, try to shoot for about a foot short of being between the floor and your ceiling. This way, you have room for a topper and if it lights, you won’t have to worry about it touching the ceiling and getting too hot. While you are decorating it, make sure you have a series of lights deep around the inner portion of the tree as well as the edges. Larger ornaments go at the base and they work up to the smallest ones at the top of the tree. This way, you end up with a brilliant looking tree that people will compliment you on.

Balloons
If you find you are just looking to fill the room with some quick Christmas cheer, pick up a series of red and green balloons. These will fill up a space quickly, keep the theme you want for your decorations and it will still feel like a holiday party, even if you don’t have a tree or other items setup. Along with this, you might also consider using some Crepe paper to fill the area above with a series of green and red options.

Decorating Tips
When it comes to decorations, keep in mind that less is more in some cases and you should embrace that attitude. While it might look awesome to pack a room full of winter villages, trees and a variety of other items, it can become visually overpowering. Instead, keep things simple and let each item that you add to your room stand out on its own. This will not only please your youth, but will make cleaning up far easier after the holiday has ended and the decorations need to come down.

 

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Church Staff Christmas Party

When it’s Christmas time, every business wants to show their Christmas spirit by having an office party. Sometimes as busy ministry staff we forget to have fun together in the church office. Why not also have an office party for the church staff?

The question is, what are you going to do? No one is going to want to play pin the tail on the donkey. That’s lame. A good Christmas party needs good food and some Christmas games to play while you’re mingling together as a church staff. What kinds of Christmas games are good for an office Christmas party though? You could play gift giving games or have different contests. There are also plenty of fun things to do together like decorating an office Christmas tree.

Door Prizes
First, there is always the solid “door prize give away”, where you give away prizes for those names that get pulled out of a hat. Have a few extra gifts for those that forget to bring one. This ensures that no one goes home without something if they want a gift. While this isn’t a exactly game, people love hearing their own name being called and they also love feeling like they’ve won something cool.

Gingerbread house
Another great idea for a church office party is to have a gingerbread house building contest. Gingerbread house kits are cheap and easy to get. You get a couple of kits and divide your staff into two groups. Then you have a contest to see who can build the best gingerbread house the fastest within a three or four minutes. Use a timer so that you‘ll know when to quit. Whoever has the best or most complete gingerbread house in the specified time frame gets a prize. You can also do this with mini Christmas trees and other “do it yourself” small projects, such as decorating cookies or stringing popcorn and cranberries.

Gift Exchange
Another good Christmas party game is a gift give away game. You pick names out of a hat to see whose turn it is to go. Each person has a small gift (provided by you, and it doesn’t have to be expensive) under the tree so that there is something for everyone. Then when your name is called, the person picks a gift and opens it. Once it’s opened, they can either keep the gift or give it to the next person. The next person picks out a gift for the first person and the first person HAS to keep it, even if it‘s inappropriate for their gender or size. This continues until all the names have been pulled out of the hat. It is interesting because if the first gift isn’t kept it can often continue on until all the men have pink slippers and all the ladies in the office have packages of men’s underwear. Did I say this was a church office party?

Having a church office party can be a disaster when you don’t have any good party games to play or entertainment. With the games that are described above, you can have a lot of fun with just a few simple items and some willing party goers. If this doesn’t work for your office, you can find more games online at Creative Christmas Ideas or convert other holiday themed party games into Christmas party games for adults. Blessed Holidays and good luck entertaining your church staff!

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Christmas Party Snacks and Food ideas

Once again, the holiday season is going full blast, Christmas is getting closer by the day, and you are thinking about throwing a Christmas party for your close friends and family or maybe for your youth group. One of my favorite times as a youth minster is inviting youth and church members to my place for a Christmas Celebration.

Planning for a Christmas Party?
Do you have everything planned out or are you still looking for great party ideas about locations, entertainment, drink, games, and food? All of these are very important things to consider because you want everything to be perfect and who would blame you for that. Of course, perhaps the most important thing to think about and get great ideas for is what you will provide people with to eat at your Christmas party. If you need activity ideas for your Christmas Party, check out Creative Christmas Ideas 

Christmas Party Main Course
With any party and particularly a Christmas party, the most important thing to figure out is what you will serve as a main course particularly if the party is going to be a dinner style party. Different regions of the world have main courses they serve for Christmas, but just because you live somewhere do not think you have to adhere to traditions there. Of course, the old stand bye’s like turkey, lamb, and ham are always very popular amongst diners. However, you may also want to think about serving a goose, duck, or maybe even something Italian like lasagna, which are also favorites of the season.

Christmas Party Side Dishes
Side dishes are also going to be very important to any Christmas feast and they will have to mesh well with the main course or main courses you decide to serve. With most meals, mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes are the main side dishes, but they are not the only option available to you. You really want to have contrast with what you serve with the meal so look at serving something like fresh made cranberry sauce, candied yams, stuffing. Vegetables are also necessary in a Christmas dinner and things like green beans, spinach and even broccoli are good choices and can be made more than one way to give the meal diversity.

Christmas Party Desserts
Everyone’s favorite part of a Christmas party or meal is dessert, and boy there are lots of ideas to choose from too. First off, let us look at some pies ideas for your Christmas party or meal. Pumpkin pie is of course the traditional favorite and they are very tasty too. However, you may want to think about serving a strawberry rhubarb pie or a pecan pie both of which are popular southern desserts served at Christmas time. Cheesecake is a popular dessert that is served at Christmas parties and meals and can be made with different fruit toppings and whipped cream.

Christmas Party Snacks
When throwing a Christmas party or meal snack food is always a good thing to have around so that people do not get hungry while waiting for their dinner. If there is no meal, but just a party snacks are a good idea for a couple of reasons. The first reason is that people like to eat good snacks over the holidays and particularly sweets. Second, if the guests happen to be drinking then snacks will help absorb the alcohol in their system. A couple of good snack ideas are Christmas cookies such as sugar cookies and snack mixes that contain thins like pretzels, peanuts, and dried fruit.

Hopefully, this has given you a few ideas for planning the food and snacks for your Christmas Party. After all, one of h best parts of any Christmas Celebration is the food!

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Christmas Party Entertainment Ideas

Christmas is a great time for getting all of your family, friends, church members and even colleagues together to celebrate the holidays, have a good time, and to create great memories too. A Christmas party is always going to be an excellent way of bringing these groups of people together to have a good time and you can throw a party in almost any venue you choose as well.

Christmas Party Invitations

The first decision you need to make is whom you want to invite to your party. The second decision you will have to make is whether this party is going to be for adults, youth, children, or a mix of the three. The third decision is going to be about entertainment.

 

When you are throwing a family Christmas party for youth, adults and children it is going to be a good idea to have entertainment that both of these groups will enjoy and can enjoy together. There are some classic party favorites that you can turn too for a mixed age Christmas get together such as bobbing for apples, and pin the tail on the donkey. You can get a lot of Christmas games and icebreakers from Creative Christmas Ideas

Music will of course play a big part of any party and this is especially true during the Christmas season so you should have a good selection or at least a playlist of good Christmas music to play. Singing or caroling is also a great entertainment idea for a mixed age party. If you need some handouts for caroling you can get my Christmas Caroling Songsheets

Christmas Party Venue

Over the holidays, many adults will attend at least one party to celebrate Christmas and they will want to go to a party where there is good entertainment and they can have some fun. One thing to consider is the venue you will use for the party and there a couple of good ideas if you are not going to use your home. Renting a banquet hall is one such idea and it is a good idea too. Banquet halls generally have a lot of room, food prep areas, and even a bandstand.

Should you decide to throw a Christmas party in your home or someone else’s home for adults only you will have a couple of entertainment benefits that you would not otherwise have in a public venue. One of the greatest benefits that you will have by using a private residence is that you and your guest will be in more comfortable surroundings, which will help your guests little to relax and enjoy what you have planned. You might want to consider live music and Christmas themed activities that are more suited to adults. Finally, you may want to consider using a caterer, which will not only provide the food, but clean up as well.

Office Christmas Parties

The most common Christmas party that most will attend is the venerable office Christmas party. If the responsibility falls on you to put one of these events together put together a checklist so that nothing will be forgotten. As far as entertainment goes, games and prizes are often a good idea for an office party. Live music is also another great idea when you throw a Christmas party, because it will people to interact and get to know each other better by dancing with each other. Games that remind the partygoers of past Christmas is a great idea too.

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Face Painting Tips for Halloween or Carnival Events

Face Painting as a Hobby or Fundraising Activity

Face painting can liven up any children’s event and add an element of fun and humor to it; not to mention aesthetic appeal. While a lot of people enjoy the art form as a hobby; others have taken it up as a profession or as a fundraiser, with ten hours spent painting gleeful faces in a variety of colors at halloween or fall festival carnivals, birthday parties for children and youth. Regardless of whether you want to try out your face panting skills at the children’s events you host at home or have turned the art form into a money making fundraiser; here are some valuable tips on face painting that will come in handy. Also included are some safety considerations, information on how to find designs that will find favor with children, paint applying tactics and more.

Face Painting tips: Where can you get the supplies?

If you are a pro at face painting, you may already know the best stores to go to in order to stock up on your face-painting supplies. However, if you have just ventured into the colorful world of this art form; the best place to find the materials you need is a local hobby shop. Try to get your face painting box ready with items such as brushes (soft and of different thickness and width); regular paint brushes should work fine here, sponges, paints and glitter.

Face painting designs for children

If you are a novice face painter, start with simple designs; what can be easier than balloons and flowers? Besides the hypo allergenic paint that is used to create the designs and the twinkiling eyes and excited smile on your canvas; there isn’t a lot of difference between face painting and regular ‘on paper’ painting. As a matter of fact, if you have always been dexterous with a painting brush, you should have no trouble mastering the art of face painting.

Face Painting Balloons
When trying to paint a balloon, you simply have to follow the natural contour of the child’s face to make an oval shape with a paint brush. Next, use a sponge to fill in the desired color; anything from blue to pink and even neon shades go well here. You can also add polka dots or any other design with a thin paint brush. Just remember to be careful when applying the paint around the child’s eyes.

Face Painting Flowers
The next theme to try out would be a colorful bouquet of flowers; for this design, you will need at least 3 to 4 colors for the flowers; use red, pink, white and even purple. Then, you will also have to apply a lot of green for the leaves. Start by making the flowers; try to get a few on the child’s cheeks; at least one on the nose and 2 or 3 on the child’s forehead. Use a fine paint brush for the dark outline of the flowers and fill color in the petals with a sponge or even with a thick brush. Use a brush dipped in green paint for the leaves; apply some pressure to create longer or shorter leaves as desired.

Face Painting Other Designs
Other popular face painting designs for children include a butterfly; tiger, lion, Dalmatian, pirate etc. There are several online resources that have in depth information on how to create these face-painting designs. Also, you don’t have to master all of them; just practice two or three good ones and make them in a variety of colors. For instance, a tiger can be painted in the characteristic yellow and orange or you could get experimental and go for a blue, red or even a pink tiger; children absolutely adore these..

Face Painting Tips

Choose the right Paint
Paints are available in both tubs as well as stick forms; if you have just started experimenting with face painting, you should use stick paints while tub colors are suitable for professionals. Either way, it is essential to remember that these paints are quite expensive, so store them properly once you are done and don’t let children get their hands on them.

Use your sponges
Sponges work better when you need to apply a base coat of paint to a child’s face or even when you have to cover a large area of the face with color. They are easy to use and quick. Always use different sponges for the different colors so that you do not waste time trying to wash out the color from a sponge.

Patience
This is the key word when trying to master face painting; when working with two colors, always wait for the first layer of paint to dry before applying the second coat. If you hurry through this phase, the colors will mix, creating a mess and you will need to wipe off the paint and start over. Also, always remember to use a thin layer of paint, go for two coats if necessary.

Have a clear idea about the design
Visualize the picture or design that you are trying to create as you apply layer after layer of paint to the child’s face. You should know exactly what you are trying to create; as a matter of fact, it is always a good idea to keep a picture on your desk. Trying to make things up as you go along simply isn’t going to work in this case.

Use stencils
If you are not good at freehand drawing, you can easily use stencils to create fantastic designs without a lot of effort. These are particularly handy when painting the faces of a lot of eager children.

Go for special effects
The paint used will usually also work as a basic glue to create bumps on the child’s nose or even big, thick eyebrows. Just soaks some cotton wool in the paint and place on the faces of the children, cover this with some tissue and paint as normal. Wheat and puffed rice can be used to make warts, use the same technique and add a dusting of flour for a ghostly effect.

Safety tips when face painting children

  • Always use hypo allergenic and non toxic paint: Only use paints that have been certified for usage on the skin; just because hobby paints come with the term ‘non-toxic’ on their packaging does not make them safe for face painting.
  • Only use cosmetic glitter on the face.
  • Do not paint the faces of children who suffer from rashes or other skin conditions that may be contagious or which may get aggravated due to the paint.
  • Use a skin friendly, antiseptic and antibacterial soap for cleaning the brushes and the sponges after use
  • Wash your hands before applying paint

Taking face paint off a child’s face

Most paints used on skin are water soluble and you will just need to wash the children’s faces with some soap and water to clean them. If glitter has been used or if you have a thick coat of paint, you may want to consider using simple olive oil to dissolve the paint before washing it off. Alternatively, you could also use a soft cloth soaked in luke warm water to gently wipe off the paint. Remember to never scrub a child’s face as this may cause redness and rashes.

With these tips, face-painting can be an enjoyable addition to many different holiday events and carnivals. It’s also a great fundraising activity for youth groups.

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Planning Ideas for a Youth – Children’s Carnival as an alternative to Halloween Trick or Treat

Why Plan a Children’s Carnival instead of the Traditional Halloween Trick-or-Treat?
As the holiday of Halloween rolls around, many schools, churches and children’s organizations start planning their SAFE alternative options to the traditional “trick or treating” activity. This allows more control over what kids receive and also to avoid some of those members of society that might place unwanted items in candy or treats. It’s also a lot safer than having kids roam the neighborhoods. Some places throw a holiday dance or get together where others opt for such things as a youth and children’s carnival. This is a great way to show children a different way to celebrate and stay safe for the Halloween holiday or simply provide an alternative if you are opposed to the celebrations of halloween in the first place.

Tips for Planning Your Halloween Carnival or Harvest Festival Event.
If you are planning such a Halloween carnival or fall festival, you will want to plan a wide variety of games and activities to have at your children’s carnival that will keep the kids entertained. Below are some of the most popular types of activity booths and games for this type of carnival celebration. It is best to have a variety of choices for kids of all ages so that they will have plenty to choose from. When you plan your carnival, think about both boys and girls and what they like to do. Include activities that are good for younger children, activities that are for older children and activities that might even be fun for their parents as well.

Carnival Games:

  • Baseball Strike Zone
    This is a game that can be adjusted for all ages. Strike zone games are generally set up for older kids but you can adapt it for the little ones. You can make a ball throwing game (It doesn’t have to be baseballs) that stands up on its own using a cardboard box. You can often get large boxes from appliance and furniture stores. Simply cut holes in the cardboard and paint it to match your Halloween event theme. You can create a carved pumpkin image with a mouth and eyes as the strike zones, a full moon with different size craters, smiley faces, flowers and many other designs. The objective is to have the children throw the balls into the various holes. You can vary the size of the holes and the point awarded for each successful throw. Make your prize selection based on the amount of points the child gets with a total of 3 to 5 balls.
  • Fishing Games
    This is something that is great for the little ones. You can do this with a large tub of water and some play fishing poles. You can get about 15 to 20 floating ducks or boats at a dollar store and paint a mark on the bottom of some of them. To make the game really simple, you can attach magnets to both the floating toys and the end of the fishing poles so that the children simply have to get the fishing pole string into the water and they will always pull up something. Those who pull up a toy with a mark on it are the winners.
  • Golfing Area
    There are many discount stores that sell play golf sets. You can get a few of these and set up a mini golf course which is great fun for all ages. You can also have a putting area where golfers can test their luck at getting a hole in one. You can make the prizes based on where the person is standing when they get the ball in the hole.

Activity Booths
There are many activity booths for your carnival that you can make out of everyday items such as bottles, cans and fishbowls:

  • Set up cans in a row and give your players balls to throw at the cans to knock them over. Fill them with sand as full cans are more difficult to knock over than empty ones.Set up plastic bottles like bowling pins and use a small ball to let your players see how many “pins” they can knock over with one try. Again, bottles filled with water or sand will be more difficult to knock over. Base your prizes on the number of cans or bottles knocked over.
  • Use small fish bowls as a game by filling them each with a fish and water. Put paper plates on top of the fishbowls with a bull’s-eye drawn on them and et the players toss coins onto the plates to try to win a fish. You can also use small balls and let the players try to throw a ball into a bowl to win a fish.
  • Use bottles and small rope rings as another game. Toss the ring over the bottle to win prizes.
  • Place a slip of paper inside a balloons with a prize written on it then let the older children toss darts and try to pop a balloon to get the prize written on the slip of paper inside.

Unlimited possibilities for your Halloween / Fall Carnival
These are just a few examples of the large number of different types of games and activity booths that you can plan for your carnival; you just need to be creative. You will find that if you plan right, your carnival will be a huge success. Just remember to have games that are good for all ages as well as games set for certain ages. Spread things out as well so it makes the carnival seem that much bigger. Add in some food booths and drinks and you have got the makings for a great carnival that is not only fun but also safe for all the participants.


Looking for More Ideas for Halloween? Check out these other possibilities from the Creative Youth Ideas Website:

Halloween Bible Studies or Sermons
Some scripture passages that might make good Halloween Bible Study or sermon topics

Bobbing for Apples
Halloween Party Game: Bobbing for apples is a common Halloween tradition in which youth try to take a bite out of an apple floating in a tub of water.

The Mask I Wear
This Halloween mask related study encourages youth to take a look at the masks we wear everyday, not just on Halloween and to expose what is underneath to God so that he can transform us so that we reveal his glory! Makes a great study for a Halloween or fall festival event.

Halloween Bowling Party
Thinking of a youth bowling party? Here’s a way to have fun while making it less dependent on skill. Great youth idea for Halloween as well!

Halloween Party or Fall Festival
Make your harvest Festival (alternative to a Halloween Party) a harvest of souls into the Kingdom of God!

Sleepy Hollow
While you may not lose your head playing this game, the head to head play is wild and fun!

Harvest Festival Games
Two games you can use at your next harvest festival or Halloween alternative event.

Pumpkin Picasso
How well can you draw the Halloween Jack-o-Lantern? What roles do a clear vision and clear instructions play in accomplishing our goals and objectives in life?

Candy Toss
Just for fun. Toss the candy into a Halloween Jack-o-lantern pumpkin and if it lands inside, you get to keep it!

Pumpkin Patch Relay
In this relay, participants will try to replace the missing pieces that have been removed from their team’s pumpkin. It can be used as party game for your October 31st Halloween alternative, for a harvest festival, or a Halloween carnival.

The Mummy
Use this game about a mummy as part of Halloween Alternative or as an introduction to the story of Lazarus.

Skeleton Race
Even if you don’t want to be involved with Halloween, you’ll want to grab at least one of those plastic or paper Halloween skeletons for this object lesson / game.

Jack-O-Lantern
Use the legend of the Jack-o-lantern to share the gospel.

A Halloween Message
A possible salvation message for a fall festival or event to replace Halloween.

Fall or Harvest Festival?
Do you have a fall festival?

Halloween Alternatives for Christians?
Looking for Halloween Alternatives? Check these out! You’ll find games and activities, many of which have an evangelistic message.

Firsts and Lasts
Our lives are often defined by the firsts and lasts which affect everything in between. What are your spiritual firsts and Lasts which define your spiritual life?

Hollywood Squares Game
This game, based on the television show “Hollywood Squares” makes a great review activity after a lesson series has been taught! You can also use it with trivia questions and modern events as a fun activity for a game night or outreach activity!

Cupcake Faith
Use this creative object lesson as a surprising illustration to kids that God looks at our heart, not our appearances. It can be used on any occasion or as a children’s sermon, but with a reference to tombs, and masks it also serves as a fun lesson for an alternative to Halloween.

Strategies to Confuse Trick or Treaters
Halloween humor

Candy
Youth will take part in a learning simulation experiencing what it is like when gifts are not appropriately utilized as a blessing to all members of the body of Christ. Makes a great activity for a Halloween Alternative or for a creative Bible Study lesson.

Pumpkin Puzzles
Youth will cut up pumpkins and then try to put a cut up pumpkin back together again. The game can be used as an object lesson illustrating God’s restoration of our lives.

A Christian Response to Halloween?
Can and should Christians provide alternatives to Halloween with the purpose of reaching youths for Christ?

Trick or Treat Relay Game
As a Halloween alternative, use this messy game based upon the common Halloween chant : “Trick-or-treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat” to teach youth about the tricks of the evil one.

Pumpkin Prayer
Object Lesson on Prayer using a pumpkin

Peter Pumpkin
Has your light gone out because of sin in your life?

Perky the Orange Pumpkin
Lesson on self-identity using a children’s story about a colorful pumpkin

Jack O’ Lantern
Create a Halloween lantern with stars for eyes, the Christian fish symbol for a mouth, and a cross for its nose. Then pass out a poem to spread the gospel message.

Pumpkin Seed Toss
Use this game as a discussion about the power of our words, or about how we choose goals in life.

Pass the Brains
Play “pass the parcel” with a pumpkin


Like A Halloween Pumpkin

Use a pumpkin to share the gospel.

Masks
What are the masks we wear?

Fear Factors
Discuss dealing with fears as a halloween alternative.

Noah’s Ark Party
Redeem Halloween with a Noah’s Ark Party and discuss the promises of God.

Candy Relay
Redeem Halloween by using this “Trick or Treat” Candy game to share the gospel

Pumpkin Bowling
Use vegetables for a wild bowling variation.

The Pumpkin
Life as a pumpkin!

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Games and Activities in Celebration of common Holidays.

Creative Holiday Ideas has over 300 pages of ideas to help you plan your next Halloween event or Fall Festival, as well as a variety of other familiar holidays. If you’ve ever wondered what you’re going to do for all the minor, but common holidays and how you’re going to do it, this resource is for you.

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Tips for Working with Youth and Handling Discipline Problems

Build Relationships with Youth
Take time to get to know each youth. Teenagers will be teenagers and are by nature restless, hyper, and noisy persons. Accept youth as the silly, noisy people they are. Learn to see their sensitive, enthusiastic, eager side which needs the nurturing of a caring adult. As you build relationships with each youth, and they feel that you appreciate and accept them, you will find a mutual trust and respect growing. Youth are much more responsive to the guidance, advice and even discipline of those they view as caring. “Youth don’t care what you know until the know that you care.” When unacceptable behavior occurs, (and it will definitely occur from time to time) it is rarely a personal attack directed toward you. It is simply a symptom of a deeper problem that a teenager might have. Behavior is always a symptom of something else. Always try to find the root causes of the behavior. When you handle the root, the behavior of the youth will change. Be careful not to embarrass a teen in front of their peers. The result will be more problems with that student. Discipline youth in private if at all possible. Create a positive but firm relationship. When you have a positive relationship with youth, often, a simple touch, look, or quick remark to quiet down is usually enough to get things moving in a positive direction again.

Create a Positive Environment for Youth
Be proactive rather than reactive. To encourage promptness, start with a “bang”. To fight the teenagers’ tendency to be late, start on time. Don’t react by running after youth, scream, or remind them of the time to get started. Instead, be proactive and start each meeting with a quick activity that will grab the attention of the youth. Youth are talkative and full of energy so instead of trying to react and calm them down, keep them actively involved throughout the programs with a variety of activities and opportunities for them to interact, to express themselves, and to release their energy. Make the youth programs positive and upbeat with a wide selection of activities that are exciting and fun, game oriented, and concise.

Guide Rather than Tell
Never tell a youth anything he can discover for himself! We all learn more by doing rather than listening. Personal discovery is much more powerful than being given the answers. When we discover things for ourselves we make them our own truth.

Be Firm with a Good Measure of Grace
At one extreme are youth leaders who are “Drill Sergeant”s and “Dictators”. At the other extreme are the “Pushovers”, the youth leaders without a backbone. While there may be times for various responses, the most effective youth leaders lie somewhere in between. Being strict won’t get the results you want; nor will being unstructured. We don’t always give youth what they want, but what they need because sometimes they are unaware of what they really need themselves. When discipline is called for we must always seek to rehabilitate, to guide youth toward positive growth rather than to simply punish. There are times when a firm hand is needed, and there are times when grace is needed. Explain what you see as the problem and encourage the teens to help come up with a solution.

Be Realistic but Encouraging Positive Growth
Remember that teenagers’ abnormal behavior is almost always normal. Their behavior is only a temporary phase youth pass through on the way to adulthood. In time they will grow out of it. While we must love them as they are, we must love them enough to not leave them as they are. And when it is hard to love them as they are, we must love them for what they can be. As adult youth leaders we need to help youth get better acquainted with who they are and who they are becoming in Christ.

Set Boundaries and Expectations for Youth
Together with the youth, as a group decide what is and is not objectionable behavior, and set specific limits accordingly. Boundaries should be empowering rather than simply inhibiting. When the students help make the rules, they break them less frequently. Once the limits are set, the youth should know and agree to the limits. But also remember that youth will forever be testing the boundaries in an attempt to discover which boundaries are firm and which ones are flexible. It’s not a rejection of the boundaries but an attempt to establish their own boundaries and find a place to stand. Always know why the boundary exists and be able to explain the rationale for it. Youth also need to recognize that there are often very real consequences for crossing over boundaries and reasons they are placed where they are. Like the edge of a cliff there will be some that want to get as close to the edge as possible for the thrill, but they risk falling over the edge and getting hurt in the process. We need to help them recognize where the boundaries are and help them to walk a comfortable distance away from them. Allow, as much as possible, for freedom and flexibility within the limits set. However, “no” must be taken seriously, not as a “maybe.”

Appropriate Responses to Youth Behavior
Build a good healthy respect for youth into your discipline. Never embarrass a youth in front of his peers. When there are problems, try to deal with a youth alone. Never attack the person, only the behavior. Rewards and punishments must be appropriate and aimed to encourage positive behavior while discouraging negative behavior. Both the “stick” and the “carrot” are effective and have their moments, but we should not go to the extremes of bribery for positive behavior and getting revenge for negative behavior. When a youth breaks a rule, don’t overreact with harshness, but correct the problem with compassion. Students need to know what will happen when a rule is broken and the consequences must be fair and fit the action.

Free Expression for Youth
Structure activities in which the young people are free to express themselves without judgement. Provide other perspectives (including the Biblical perspective) and other ways to view things without labeling the youth as wrong. When the truth is clear and the choices are presented to them in a no judgmental way most youth will correct themselves. But when threatened youth are more likely to be defensive, rebellious, or even confrontational. Use group-building exercises to let students be talkative and noisy within an orderly context. Youth will appreciate the opportunity to express themselves. You will appreciate the the fact that some energy can be released in a positive way.

Actively Involve the Youth
Allow your youth to help you plan and implement activities. The more ownership youth have in the event, the less discipline problems you’ll have. Involvement and responsibility creates commitment. Whether your youth group is large or small your functions should include a variety of activities that cater to a variety of energy levels and interests, especially with younger youth. During discussions, break up the youth into small groups so no one is left out. Often youth who don’t get involved are the ones who cause the most problems. Also be conscious of transitions. Move smoothly and quickly from one activity to another. When a lag occurs between activities, problems tend to occur.

Actively Involve Caring Adults
When other adults are included they bring with them a variety of gifts, leadership styles, and personalities. A few adults seated among the youth can help maintain control of the group without attracting a lot of attention. Some are better at disciplining without harshness. Some are respected by the youth already. The youth will respond to them well when these leaders must “have a talk” with them.

What to Do with Unacceptable Behavior
You cannot allow one youth to spoil the event for everyone. If a teenager senses you are sincere about your frustration, he usually will respond in a positive manner. If further disruption continues, be prepared to take harsher action in love, if necessary.


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Discipline with Youth: Preventive Discipline

With teens, abnormal behavior is almost always normal and only a temporary phase they pass through on the path toward adulthood. Remember your own teen years, be flexible and keep a good sense of humor.

Discipline is from the word “disciple” which means “learner”. Therefore discipline is leading a person into self-control through instruction and example. It is not the same as punishment. Punishment may be a part of discipline as it is a means to control behavior when a person is unable to exercise self control. Our goal is the internal control of the teen instead of the external control of the teacher.

Preventive discipline

I. Set reasonable limits

  1. Decide what is and what is not objectionable behavior and set specific limits accordingly. Consider the age and needs of youth.
  2. Youth should know and agree to the limits and have some limited room for negotiation. Allow, as much as possible, for freedom and flexibility within the rules set. Like bargaining for a price it is best to set your price too high and bargain down to where you
    want. In the end both parties feel that have a gotten a good deal! If youth help make the rules they break them less frequently.
  3. Be careful not to set too many rules. Decide which battles are worth fighting and save your resources for the battles that are really important.

 

II. Establish consequences

  1. Avoid threats.
  2. Once limits are set, don’t budge on them. Youth are continually testing limits to see how far they push them. They want freedom but they also want limits that are firm. It gives them security. Yet they must also know what will happen when a rule is broken. They WILL break them at times even to just see if you will follow through.
  3. Consequences should be edifying, consistent, fair and fit the action. Don’t play favorites. Build a good healthy respect for youth in discipline. Never embarrass a youth in front of peers. Deal with them alone and attack the behavior, not the person.

 

III. Create the right atmosphere

  1. Set a positive tone to your relationship. Notice and affirm appropriate behavior. If you spend most of your time affirming you will need to spend little time correcting. Affirmation & encouragement are inspiring. Criticism is largely self defeating.
  2. Youth can tell if you are a drill sergeant, a pushover or someone in between. Being too strict is a mistake but so is being too lenient. A happy balance must be established so that youth are allowed free expression as their talkative high energy selves within an orderly context.
  3. Correct with compassion instead of harshness.
  4. Avoid the use of labels to characterize youth such as “naughty”, “bad”, “good”, “lazy”, “slow”, etc.

 

IV. Eliminate conditions which cause behavior problems 

  1. Conditions leading to discipline problems may be internal, external, temperament, developmental or symptomatic:
    • Poor student/ teacher ratio
    • The room being too hot or too cold
    • The room being too crowded
    • The room having too many distractions
    • Make sure activities involve everyone. Often youth who aren’t involved are the ones that create the most problems.
    • Move smoothly and quickly between activities. When a lag occurs between activities, problems tend to occur.
    • Arrive early, prepared, and ready to start. Start with a “bang” to encourage promptness. Fight teens’ tendency to be late by starting on time. Start meetings with a quick activity that will grab their attention instead of running after them, wasting your time trying to round them up.
    • Use positive clear directions. If youth are unclear of instructions then tend to be disruptive.
    • High sugar at beginning of sessions

 

V. Build relationships
Youth are more likely to respond to someone who respects them as individuals and whom they have grown to respect. Get to know all youth, especially those tending toward behavioral problems. Accept their silly, noisy sides and direct their high energy into appropriate outlets. Accept feelings and high energy they cannot control but seek to stop disruptive, annoying, and destructive behavior.

VI. Plan high energy programs
Youth have an attention span in minutes approximately equal to their age in years. Good meetings are positive, upbeat, and have a wide range of activities that are exciting and fun, game oriented, and concise.

VII. Plan with youth
The more ownership youth have in an event, the less discipline problems you will have.


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Face Paint Recipe

With Halloween just around the corner, a lot of churches are looking for alternatives for their children and youth. Many churches have fall carnivals, or harvest festivals. One popular activities for church carnival events with children is face painting.

Here’s a recipe for facepaint for those who might be interested.

1 teaspoon cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon water
1-1/2 teaspoon cold cream.
A few drops of food color

Mix all the ingredients together in a small paper cup, using a toothpick. If the mixture is too thick to paint with, thin with a few drops of water. The paint can be applied with a paint brush for small areas or you can spread it all over your face with your fingers.

Idea: While the paint is till wet, you can add some glitter to your design.

 

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Youth Ministers Wish Senior Pastors Would

  1. take at least 2 hours a week and disciple me, train me in all areas of ministry, hold me accountable, be honest even when it hurts, correct me, and encourage me.
  2. ask for my input on decisions that affect my ministry.
  3. recognize the need to communicate more with me.
  4. understand that a lack of planning on his part does constitute an emergency on my part.
  5. see the youth as a vital force of the church now, not just in the future.
  6. dedicate more time in building a personal relationship with me and not just a working relationship.
  7. allow me to focus more on youth ministry and not so much on associate duties.
  8. be more relevant in his thinking so we could reach more people effectively.
  9. cast more vision to the staff as a whole and not keep us guessing where his heart is.
  10. grant more freedom to spend money on effective youth ministry outreaches and events that have eternal rewards.
  11. feel a freedom to delegate more ministry to lay leaders to take pressure off the staff.
  12. spend more time focusing on the ministry within the church than on his golf game.
  13. be more compassionate toward people.
  14. live what he preaches.
  15. show more respect to his wife in public.
  16. be more relevant by not restricting the youth ministry from using multimedia in presenting the gospel.
  17. plan ahead and not overwhelm me with too many responsibilities, thus respecting my time.
  18. affirm me more.
  19. not take me for granted.
  20. have more of a spirit of excellence pertaining to his ministry and leadership to others.

Taken from an informal poll received on a youth pastors Email list serve


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Back to School Youth Room Decorations Ideas

Back to School Preparations

After the school summer break, its time to head back to school and most youth ministers want to kick off the new school year with a big bang. Children are promoted up into the youth group, some youth leaders have graduated and new leaders among the youth must rise up and take over new responsibilities. Some students transfer to new schools, and new friends were made during the summer break. Often new volunteers start their service at this time. A simple and great way to indicate to the youth that something new and exciting is coming and to welcome all these changes and transitions is to decorate or re-decorate the youth room.

Youth Room Decoration Ideas

Trying to decide the best way to decorate or re-decorate the youth room can be very daunting. If you can, get the youth involved in the process. You want the youth room to look good and inviting and also to engage the youth in your group. Even if you don’t have a dedicated room for the youth, there are things you can do to spruce up the room you are using. And, it lets everyone know that great things are ahead and this year is going to be something special.

Here are a few ideas and suggestions for decorating the youth room when youth go back to school for a new school year:

Excitement and Anticipation
It’s kind of hard to sell the youth on the idea that there are great new things ahead, when the youth room looks the same as it did for the past few months. Although the church may have certain guidelines and you also have to consider other uses of the room there is always something you can do to add life and excitement. Of course if you have the primary use of a room you can do so much more.

Functional
One of the first things you have to remember is that the youth room decorations must serve its primary function. If it is a classroom it needs to be conducive to a learning situation. If it is a recreation room you want to have open spaces and room for people to move. So as you think through your youth room decorations, be sure to first examine what you hope will happen in the room and update it in a way to be conducive to that. Couches and Bean bag chairs create a very different feeling than classroom desks. Bright direct lights create a different atmosphere that indirect and ambient lighting. Music is a very dramatic way to set the mood for a room. You should try to have different areas in your room for different activities. A quiet area where the decor is more subtle and peaceful where students can sit and read or relax is always appreciated.

Attractive / Inviting
The youth room although being used by youth is also being used for long periods by you. This means that it should look nice and be comfortable. You should decorate it so that you can look around and be proud and pleased with the way it looks. You should place items that are relevant to your likes and the things that both you and the youth would want to be looking at and might even relate to the Back to School theme . While you want it to be exciting, you also don’t want it to be distracting and uncomfortable for those in the room.

Objects that invite curiosity and discussion
The youth room will look better with fun items in it and this can also encourage your class to talk about the items. Even if some of the items that you are placing in the room have little initial interest to the students you will be surprised how much they talk about them. Artifacts and pieces from around the Biblical world may start conversations of travel, Bible history and Bible geography without trying. This is one of the easiest ways to engage a youth room full of students to talk by not actually asking them anything.

Youth Focused
You should try to get the youth involved in decorating the youth room and having one wall dedicated to them is a great idea. You can make it the sharing wall where they put up things they like. You can then bring everyone together to discuss everyone’s different ideas and tastes, a room full of youth will often have many different tastes. Students love to be involved and they will often look after the youth room more if they have helped to create it. You are teaching them the lessons of respect and learning how to keep areas clean and tidy.

Dynamic with a lot of Variety
You should try to change the decor often and usually as you change into another subject or Biblical focus it is an idea to change the items on the walls.

Get creative
There are many different ideas that you can use for your youth room and often the only thing holding you back is your imagination. You do not need to spend a fortune getting a great looking room and with a little time, effort and enthusiasm you can create so much. Your students will love being in their youth room and will want to come in everyday. Youth will learn about God and Christian Living better in an environment that they enjoy being in.

Besides simply decorating the room, you might want to plan some games and icebreakers.

 


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Stress Test for Youth

STRESS SCALE FOR YOUTH

PTS: STRESS EVENT
100: 1. Death of spouse, parent, boyfriend/girlfriend
065: 2. Divorce (of yourself or your parents)
065: 3. Puberty
065: 4. Pregnancy (or causing pregnancy)
060: 5. Marital separation or breakup with boyfriend/girlfriend
060: 6. Jail term or probation
060: 7. Death of other family member (other than spouse, parent or boyfriend/girlfriend)
055: 8. Broken engagement
050: 9. Engagement
045: 10. Serious personal injury or illness
045: 11. Marriage
045: 12. Entering college or beginning next level of school
045: 13. Change in independence or responsibility
045: 14. Any drug and/or alcoholic use
045: 15. Fired at work or expelled from school
045: 16. Change in alcohol or drug use
040: 17. Reconciliation with mate, family or boyfriend/girlfriend
040: 18. Trouble at school
040: 19. Serious health problem of a family member
035: 20. Working while attending school
035: 21. Working more than 40 hours per week
035: 22. Changing course of study
035: 23. Change in frequency of dating
035: 24. Sexual adjustment problems (confusion of sexual identity)
035: 25. Gain of new family member (new baby born or parent remarries)
035: 26. Change in work responsibilities
030: 27. Change in financial state
030: 28. Death of a close friend (not a family member)
030: 29. Change to a different kind of work
030: 30. Change in number or arguments with mate, family or friends
025: 31. Sleep less than 8 hours per night
025: 32. Trouble with in-laws or boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s family
025: 33. Outstanding personal achievement (awards, grades, etc.)
020: 34. Mate or parents start or stop working
020: 35. Begin or end school
020: 36. Change in living conditions (visitors in the home, change in roommates)
020: 37. Change in personal habits (start or stop a habit like smoking or dieting)
020: 38. Chronic allergies
020: 39. Trouble with the boss
015: 40. Change in work hours
015: 41. Change in residence
015: 42. Change to a new school (other than graduation)
015: 43. Presently in pre-menstrual period
015: 44. Change in religious activity
010: 45. Going in debt (you or your family)
010: 46. Change in frequency of family gatherings
010: 47. Vacation
010: 48. Presently in winter holiday season
005: 49. Minor violation of the law 5

TOTAL SCORE = ____________

If you have experienced total stress within the last twelve months of 250 or greater, even with normal stress tolerance, you may be overstressed. Persons with low stress tolerance may be overstressed at levels as low as 150.

Adapted from “How to Survive Unbearable Stress” by Steve Burns MD (USA: Pergamon Press.1989)


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Signs of Personal Stress in your Ministry

You may be coping unsuccessfully with personal stress if you:

    1. Don’t take vacations or don’t enjoy them when you do take them.
    2. Don’t have a sense of humor.
    3. Don’t recognize when you are getting fatigued.
    4. Believe that being busy means being productive.
    5. View change as a threat instead of a challenge.
    6. Feel that you are not in control of events.
    7. Do not engage in any regular exercise.
    8. Excessively seek out diversions to take your mind off your work.
    9. Worry excessively about problems.
    10. Do not have interests outside your ministry.

 


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What can you do to help young people handle disappointment?

Here are some suggestions to help parents and youth workers to effectively teach young people how to handle disappointments that occur in their daily lives:

  1. Try to see situations from the child’s point of view as well as your own.
  2. If you are responsible for setting up an expectation the child has, then own that and take steps to set up and expectation that is better for both of you.
  3. To make the change to more realistic expectations validate the child’s feelings of disappointment
  4. Relate a time when you experienced disappointment
  5. Verbalise the feelings. Show the child the words that describe the feeling as this will help them describe theirs.
  6. Enable the child to see that our feelings do not have to equal our actions.
    Ask questions like:

    • Do you feel disappointed some sometimes?
    • Do you feel disappointed because we usually do this and today we aren’t?
    • Does that make you feel frustrated?
    • Does it make you feel angry?

    Choose your words carefully and emphasise the word ‘FEEL’. “When this happens, DO YOU FEEL ANGRY?” This question implies that anger is a feeling…not an action. It’s a completely different question to “When this happens ARE YOU ANGRY”, which implies angry actions which we do not want the child to engage in. What you ultimately want is for your child to recognise their emotions and over time learn how to decide on appropriate and effective positive actions. This is a very empowering process that develops with practice and allows the child to feel in control of themselves.

  7. Model how you handle disappointment. Verbalise your own mental processes when you are experiencing disappointment.
  8. And lastly, if you know a situation is coming up that will be naturally disappointing to the child, then prepare your child:
    • Let them know what’s going to happen so they don’t let their anticipation build.
    • Validate that this will be disappointing for them. This implies that it’s OK to feel disappointed but that you expect they will know how to handle the feeling…that you have confidence in them and this gives them personal power to cope.
    • Do not bribe them to pacify them. This implies you do not have confidence in them and removes their personal power to cope.

Helping children and youths to handle the emotion of disappointment does not take any more time than not helping them to handle the emotion of disappointment. In fact, it may save you time, help your relationship and empower your child to experience more happiness in their life.

By Vicki Jardine, Director of Highly Successful Kids.
You can catch up with Vicki at:
/highlysuccessfulkids.com


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How well do you know your youth?

Choose one youth by name then ask yourself the following questions:

RELATIONSHIPS

  • Describe your relationship with this youth.
  • How would this youth describe his or her relationship with you?
  • How well does this youth relate to the rest of his peers?
  • Describe this youth’s relationship with his or her parents.

IDENTITY

  • How would this youth describe himself or herself?
  • What strengths and weaknesses would this youth identify about himself / herself?
  • What are this youth’s goals in life?
  • How does this youth spend his or her free time?

SPIRITUAL

  • Describe his or her level of involvement in church and youth activities?
  • Why dos this youth come to church and other youth events?
  • How does he or she feel about church and Bible study?
  • How important does this youth consider his or her relationship with God?
  • What evidence of spiritual growth in the life of this youth can you see?
  • What spiritual gifts does this youth manifest in his or her life and how can you develop these through the life of the church and through involvement in the youth program?


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How teens can give their parents a heart attack

  1. Brag about your parents once in a while. Let them know you are proud of them and tell others about it.
  2. Say “Yes” when your parents ask you to do something with them. They will be elated to know you are not ashamed to be seen with them.
  3. Be grateful for your parents. Parents really respond when their children occasionally say, “Thank you.” Give mom and dad credit for what they have done and are doing for you.
  4. Give your parents reason to be proud of the way you dress, how clean you keep your room, how consistently you practice your music lessons, and how you feel about God and your church.
  5. Be understanding if your parents are impatient. When they can’t buy you something you need right away, or when they worry about you more than you feel is necessary, try to see it their way.
  6. Give your parents a hug and say, “I love you” and show that you mean it.

If you follow these simple steps you’ll give your mom and dad a “heart attack” of new appreciation of restored communication and of love refreshed!

Try it!

(Adapted: Source unknown)

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Recreation in Youth Ministry: Things to Consider

In order for recreation to most effectively minister and encourage the highest number of youth it should de-emphasize athletic ability, individual performance, and “winning at all costs”. There are six factors to avoid in planning recreation for youth:

  1. Make sure no one is left out;
  2. Beware of negative reinforcement;
  3. Beware of mismatching youth;
  4. Beware of creating psychological stress;
  5. Beware of setting youth up for failure; and
  6. Beware of over-organization.

In light if these, youth recreation must

  1. Emphasize group effort,
  2. Encourage total participation,
  3. Provide fun for all,
  4. Present as many “everyone wins” situations as possible,
  5. Mix planned activities with free time keeps youth from being bored and allows them some freedom to do their own thing.
  6. Competition should emphasize the team and not the individual.

Initiative and cooperative games, which emphasize group problem solving make the problem the opponent instead of another person or team. The conquering of these problems as a team effort

  1. Builds unity and a sense of group identity,
  2. Promotes communication,
  3. Encourages cooperation, and
  4. Develops trust among team members.

There are several considerations in choosing activity for youth:

  1. safety
  2. age of the group
  3. sex
  4. ability of group members
  5. size of the group
  6. personality of the group
  7. the intended purpose of the activity

Edward Hayes (“Recreational Activities” Youth Education in the Church. Moody Bible Institute, Chicago: 1978. pp 308-323) says youth leaders must account for the basic characteristics of recreation:

    1. activity
    2. variety of form
    3. use of unobligated time
    4. voluntary participation
    5. flexibility
    6. purposeful behavior
    7. promotion of socially accepted and thoroughly Christian behavior.

Other considerations:

  1. A recreational activity must include as many safety precautions as possible.
  2. The age of the group is a factor because different ages of youth will enjoy different games. Also, at younger age groups some youth may lack physical coordination and skill for highly competitive sports.
  3. Even though girls can engage in most of the same activities with boys, some activities are best not used with coed groups, especially those that involve highly physical interaction. Also, girls do not necessarily enjoy male dominated sports such as football.
  4. The size of the group is important. It is difficult to have a volleyball game with two people. Other games and recreational activities may be inappropriate for large groups.
  5. The personality of the group, its likes and dislikes is another important factor. The best game is one that works for your specific group of youth.


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Recreation as a teacher of life skills in youth ministry

Recreation is an incredible tool for youth ministry. While games may not be overtly spiritual, they are a very powerful teaching tool to condense many of the realities of life down into a short period of time. The way we respond in games often reflects how we deal with the realities of life. They reveal our attitudes, our strengths, our weaknesses, the ways we communicate and relate to other people, our ability to lead, the way we deal with challenges, rules, and difficulties. They show our approach to solving problems and maybe most importantly they show our REACTIONS to a variety of circumstances. When the pressure is on, what comes out, actions, words, mindsets, and believes often reveals the most about us.

As youth and youth workers work and play together, they learn to help one another, share possessions, overcome fears, draw closer to God, open up, and even risk sharing about themselves with the group. Hassles do occur but they serve as catalysts for growth and sharing and force individuals to move beyond superficial relationships. Regular sports and games often present many of life’s problems in capsule form. The factors of stress, competition, rules to be followed, success and failure, and cooperation in a team effort are common to sports, games, daily life and Christian living both inside the church and outside it.

As such, recreation should not be focused on the event., the program, the game. Instead it should be focused on the people and creating opportunities for them to grow spiritually and relationally. Relationships are of vital importance to God and should be an integral part of youth ministry. Its about people, not programs. When the programs become the focus they too easily become gimmicks to get people to come to the youth group.

Edward L. Hayes (“Recreational Activities” Youth Education in the Church. Moody Bible Institute, Chicago: 1978. pp 308-323) warns against using recreation as a “hidden persuader.” He says that when this occurs “recreation is cheapened, and the gospel is viewed as related to and dependent on gimmicks.”

In addition to nurturing relationships, recreation has emotional and psychological benefits to youth as well as the obvious physical benefits to their health. Recreation can help alleviate stress among youth. Highly charged recreational activities, which allow the youth to “cut loose,” may help get the attention of youth off their worries and onto God and spiritual truths. Poor Self-esteem or self-image is one of the most widespread issues facing teens today. Recreation can help alleviate problems of self-image by providing an opportunity for youth to express hidden abilities and talents.

Many games can also be structured to become metaphors for life and spiritual truth. Wet and wild games involving water can be used to springboard into lessons on the “Living Water.” In fact the concept of a race is explicitly mentioned several times in the Bible to illustrate spiritual truths. Games in which youth are blindfolded become metaphors on spiritual blindness. The possibilities are as numerous as the games people play.

Recreation can be used in a variety of ways and for a variety of purposes:

    • Recreational activities can be an effective means to loosen up the group.
    • Recreation can help break up cliques and draw shy people into the group.
    • Recreational activities may help prevent discipline problems that usually are a result from boredom, misdirected energy, or unused creativity.
    • Recreation may be combined with fund-raising such as walk-a-thons, jog-a-thons, and even work-a-thons. Recreation may take the form of ministry to others as service projects and workdays.
    • High adventure outings are some of the most unusual but also most rewarding activities for youth and therefore merit special attention. They can be used to improved self-esteem, encourage cooperation, build trust, enhance communication, provide opportunity for introspection, provide a change of scenery, provide challenging activities, and enhance problem solving, spiritual awareness, and outdoor skills. High adventure outings create special group dynamics, have elements of stress and (controlled) danger, a “roughing it” atmosphere and long term effects on those who attend. The relationships built on such outings never fail to provide opportunities for ministry.

For more information on how you can use games and recreation in youth ministry check out some of these resources:

  • Mattingly, Don and Scott Werner. The Centrifuge Experience: Meeting Youth Needs. Convention Press, Nashville: 1987.
  • Rice, Wayne and Mike Yaconelli. Play It. Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids: 1986.

Better yet, visit a local Christian book store and someone will be sure to point you to shelves of books with creative ideas and games you can use in your youth ministry!


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Recreation as a Tool in Youth Ministry

Youth programs that are ‘too spiritual’ for recreation (games and fun group activities) probably will not achieve their spiritual goals because they will be leaving out a primary tool for achieving them. All people are involved in some form of recreation to an extent, but especially youth. Four factors make recreation an important tool in youth ministry:

  1. Youth are activity-oriented;
  2. Youth are motivated by involvement;
  3. Youth desire to have fun;
  4. Youth need positive social interaction and need practice interacting socially in a controlled environment.


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Recreation as a Relational Bridge in Youth Ministry

Recreation frequently provides important relational and communication bridges to youth. These bridges make possible the church’s ministries of evangelism and discipleship. Recreation can be used as:

  1. a channel of service and support,
  2. a catalyst for outreach,
  3. a vehicle for ministry and mission action, and
  4. a tool for teaching

Most young people’s lives are changed by gospel truth as that truth is interpreted in relationships. It has been said people may come to an event because of the program, but they continue to come back because of the relationships.


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Obstacles to Prayer Groups

Fear
One of the number one fears that people have is the fear of public speaking. While prayer is communication with God, if there are other people listening and it is a corporate prayer meeting, people are similarly afraid of prayer. This fear can be somewhat alleviated if we provide training for those that will lead prayer, and avoid putting people on the spot to pray without prior notice and training. Stress that prayer is communication with God. It is talking to God. Also stress that in private, you can pray to God in whatever way most comfortable for you, but in corporate prayer it is best to do it in such a way that you benefit those listening in on your prayers with God.

Communication Issues
Prayer is communication, and like every other form of communication it only develops with training and experience. Many people have not developed the skill of communicating verbally with God so they may tend to repeat prayers and phrases they have heard — simply stringing together prayers they often hear. The best way to overcome this is to provide specific guidance for prayer items.

Unrealistic Expectations 
Many people think that they will be considered less spiritual if their prayers are not on the level of the pastor or other church leaders. We need to stress in training that God is more concerned with our heart than how polished our prayer sounds.

Violation of confidences
Sometimes it can become a fine line between honestly praying for someone in need and turning the prayer request into little more than gossip sessions or finger pointing sessions. We need to pray for so and so because he did such and such…. Keep confidences and private prayer requests private. Make sure that even in prayer that everything we say is edifying to those who are listening. (Ephesians 4:29)

Planning issues
Many prayer meetings lack variety and become boring and routine. Vary the format and introduce a variety of concepts, styles, and vary the focus to add a little life to meetings that have become stale.


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Youth Christmas Party Planning Checklist

Christmas is just around the corner… Have you prepared for your youth Christmas Party yet?

If you don’t get things moving well in advance, instead of enjoying the Christmas Vacation with the youth, you could end up being totally stressed and miss valuable opportunities to impact their lives and those of their friends and families.

So here’s a Youth Christmas Planning Checklist… (FIRST DRAFT – IDEAS WELCOME for improvement)

Form a Christmas Party planning committee

  • Who needs to be involved in the planning for the Christmas Party? (i.e. parents, youth workers, youth, pastoral staff, others?)
  • What are the roles in the planning and preparation for the Christmas Party and who will be responsible for each role?

Coordinate your Youth Christmas Party with the church as a whole

  • How will the Christmas Party fit into the over all schedule of Church activities? Does it complement the Church Christmas theme or focus?
  • Will there be duplication? Should some parts of the Christmas party be jointly organised?
  • Will there be conflicts of manpower and facilities?
  • Is your planned date for the Christmas Party on the overall church calendar?
  • Who will you need to coordinate with? Will it be part of the overall church Christmas plan or separate?

Decide the Christmas Activities Schedule

  • List the individual activities that will be part of your Youth Christmas program.
  • What are the times and dates of each event?
  • What is the venue or location for each event?
  • How will the Christmas Party fit into the schedule?

Decide your Goal for the Christmas Party

  • Purpose: What is the purpose for the Christmas party? Is it evangelistic? In appreciation? A simple celebration? To reach out to the community? To help the needy?
  • Target group: Who is the target group for the Christmas Party? Who do you want to attend the Christmas Party? (age group, Christians / seekers, friends of youth, parents, youth workers, community, etc.)
  • Brief Description: Write a clear description of the Christmas Party and its goals.
  • Theme: What is the theme for the Christmas Party?

Plan the Details for the Christmas Party

  • What is the official name of for the Christmas Party? Does the name clearly communicate the purpose
  • and content?
  • You should have already written down the date and time and venue for the Party. In addition you will want to add directions to the venue? Is there a map available? About how long will it
  • take travel there? Is it difficult to find?

Tentative Christmas Party Program

  • What activities will fill the time during the Christmas Party? OVER PLAN and have ALTERNATIVES. (e.g. Icebreakers, gift exchange, Bible study, Movies, Large Group Games, etc.) If you are using another venue, doing an on site inspection in advance will help you better prepare for Christmas games and activities. If there is a gift exchange, how will the exchange be coordinated? A great resource for planning your Christmas Party is the Creative Youth Ideas Christmas Collection.

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Christmas Party Finances

  • What’s the expected actual cost?
  • What is the budget for the Youth Christmas Party?
  • What is the cost to participants?
  • If there is a Christmas gift exchange, what is the price range for the participant’s gifts?
  • Are there sponsors / sources of supplies or food for the Christmas Party? Will parents or church members make contributions of Christmas goodies and food?
  • Are there scholarships available?
  • Does the cost change for early or late sign-ups?
  • When is payment for the Christmas Party due?

Christmas Party Arrangements

  • Reservation of Venue?
  • Recruit Adult chaperons / volunteers for the Christmas Party – A good rule of thumb is to have one chaperon (parent/youth pastor/leader) for every eight youth that attend. (Some groups may require more or less supervision)
  • Are there to be Special speakers / special items or programs utilizing outside people?
  • Someone trained in first aid or medicine on site in case of an injury.
  • What food will be available at the Christmas party? Meals and snacks should be designed to meet the needs of all attendees. Are there any special dietary requirements or restrictions?
  • Are there any transportation requirements?
  • Contact information for those responsible for major roles and duties?
  • Address and contact of nearest medical emergency aid?
  • What Rules will be enforced?
  • Create an ‘Incident Report’ form for any injuries, accidents or security breaches that occur during the Christmas Party?

Christmas Events Publicity

  • Promotional fliers
  • Church Bulletin
  • Church / youth Calendar or events
  • Invitations – Your invitations should state the starting and ending time of your Christmas party and should mention the food you will be serving. And don’t forget to include directions to get to the venue, expecially for first timers. You also will want to include any cost and indicate whether or not participants should bring a gift for a gift exchange and costing for such gifts.
  • Sign-up form / Permission slips
  • Postcards to invite friends
  • Posters / Bulletin Boards
  • Website / emails
  • Local newspaper

Equipment and resources needed for the Christmas Party

  • Are the tables and chairs available at the venue sufficient for participants and the food?
  • Sound system? Upbeat Christmas Music?
  • Special lighting?
  • Special equipment?
  • Materials and resources for games?
  • Parking space? Drop off and pick-up point for parents?
  • Requisition forms for supplies, Checkout / return out form for any equipment or supplies that are borrowed?

Handling emergencies

  • Any time you get a group of youth together there is a possibility of accidents. They will happen. So be prepared for them.
  • Christmas Party Attendee list – Name, contact number for parents, and permission slips if you are leaving the church premises. Keep the contact information together in a folder and available at all times in case of an emergency. Make a master copy and a standby copy.
  • Sponsor list
  • Emergency contacts
  • Fire, medical, and police department numbers
  • What is the name, address and phone number of the nearest hospital or urgent care facility? (This information should be included on your health form/parent release.). What is the most direct route from the venue?
  • What are the venue management contacts?
  • Prepare a Parent’s contact list.
  • Prepare a Volunteer list with assigned roles and contact numbers?
  • What transportation arrangements are required. Contact numbers?

Christmas Party Volunteer Training

    • Screen Volunteers
    • Meet with volunteers as a group before party.
    • List responsibilities and contact numbers for each volunteer including a ‘Chain of Command’ – who reports to whom, who makes final decisions?
    • Make sure volunteers are clear on the rules.
    • Familiarize volunteers with the layout of the venue – especially exits, potential problem areas or hazards.
    • Assign people in your team to be responsible for cleaning up any spills/ broken glass as soon as it happens?
    • Trouble shoot with volunteers. What things could happen during the party and how should the volunteers respond?
    • Have people and vehicles on standby to travel with youth in case of emergency.
    • Instruct volunteers in how to complete the ‘Incident Report’ form for any injuries, accidents or security breaches that occur during the Christmas Party and what information is needed. They need to get signatures of any eyewitnesses.
    • Go through the entire Party schedule. What resources are needed for each item on the schedule and who is responsible to make sure they are ready?
    • Volunteers must be flexible and ready to help out as needed.

The Day of the Christmas Party

  • Set up the decorations according to your theme.
  • Set up for games / activities
  • Test the sound system and Christmas music
  • Delivery and storage of food and supplies
  • Identify key volunteers to participants, especially the medical person.
  • Are floor surfaces clear of trip hazards and electrical cords?
  • Are all security, staff and volunteers easily identified with either a uniform, t-shirt, ID badge or cap?
  • Are Emergency/Fire exits clear of any obstructions and will they have adults monitoring them?
  • Are there first-aid supplies, fire extinguishers? If so, where are they located?
  • If you are going to have a gift exchange, have quite a few backups for those that forget or unexpected gifts. Try to insure that everyone gets a gift.
  • Be sure to have someone take photos and video of the event. They make great Christmas Party souvenirs.
  • Clean up – It’s important to leave the hall or building in the same shape as you found it.
  • Involve everyone in this process.

After the Christmas Party

  • Return rental or borrowed items
  • Thank everyone who made the Christmas Party possible
  • Meet with the Christmas Party planning committee and evaluate. Ask: What worked well? What could we have done differently? What did we learn from this process?
  • Review any incident reports completed and see what steps can be taken to prevent similar incidents happening at future youth events.
  • Complete and file a written event summary including any resources and suggestions for future planning of Christmas Parties.
  • Send “thank you” cards to everyone who help in any way

This document is a guide only. It contains general information and is not intended to represent a comprehensive checklist. Have suggestions to add? Any words of wisdom? Please click on the comments link below and share with us your wisdom and experience in regards to organizing Christmas Parties for your youth!

Lock-in Checklist

A “lock in” is an overnight party. The doors might not be literally locked, but no-one goes in or out. Use this comprehensive lock-in checklist to help you plan.

Form a lock-in planning committee

  • Who needs to be involved in the planning for the lock-in? (i.e. parents, youth workers, youth, pastoral staff, others?)
  • What are the roles in the planning and preparation for the lock-in and who will be responsible for each role?

Decide your Goals for the lock-in

  • What is the purpose for the lock-in.
  • Who is the Target group? Who do you want to attend the lock-in? (age group, Christians / seekers, friends of youth, etc.)
  • Write a clear description of the lock-in and its goals.

Plan the Details for the lock-in

  • What is the official name of the lock-in? Does the lock-in name clearly communicate the purpose and content?
  • When is the date and Time?
  • Where is the venue for the lock-in? (Church, community center, skate rink, school, multiple locations?) What are the directions to the venue? Is there a map available? About how long will it take travel there? Is it difficult to find?

Tentative lock-in Schedule / Program

  • What activities will fill the time during the lock-in? OVER PLAN and have ALTERNATIVES.
    (e.g. Icebreakers, Bible study, Board games, video games, Movies, Large Group Games, Skating, Sports, Swimming, Bowling, Volleyball, Basketball, Water Balloon fights, Discussions, Community Service, Dodge ball, capture the flag, floor hockey, carpetball, etc.) If you are using another venue, doing an on site inspection in advance will help you better prepare for lock-in games and activities.
  • Set a bed-time and a wake-up time. Don’t expect the teens to actually sleep during a lock-in, but do have have a time when everyone will wind down with quiet activities and an opportunity for those to sleep who might wish to do so. Also set a wake-up time, especially if you’ll be serving breakfast in the morning.

Lock-in Finances

  • What’s the expected actual cost of the lock-in and activities?
  • What is the budget for the lock-in?
  • What is the cost to participants?
  • Are there sponsors / sources of supplies or food for the lock-in?
  • Are there scholarships available?
  • Does the cost change for early or late sign-ups?
  • Does the cost go down if kids get their friends to sign up for the lock-in? Are there multiple levels of discounts tied to the number of friends who sign up?
  • When is payment due for the lock-in?

Lock-in Arrangements

  • Reservation of Venue?
  • Recruit Adult chaperons / volunteers for the lock-in – A good rule of thumb is to have one chaperon (parent/youth pastor/leader) for every eight youth that attend. (Some groups may require more or less supervision)
  • Are there to be Special speakers / special items or programs utilizing outside people?
  • Someone trained in first aid or medicine on site in case of an injury.
  • What food will be available at the lock-in? Dinner? Snacks? Breakfast? Quantity? Meals and snacks should be designed to meet the needs of all attendees. Are there any special dietary requirements or restrictions?
  • Transportation requirements for the lock-in?
  • What do participants need to bring to the lock-in? (sleeping bag, pillow, snacks, games, swim suit, towel, toothbrush and toothpaste, comfortable clothing and shoes?)
  • What contact information is available for parents of youth attending the lock-in?
  • Contact information for those responsible for major roles and duties?
  • Address and contact of nearest medical emergency aid?
  • Sleeping Arrangements for the lock-in – Provide separate rooms for guys and gals sleeping arrangements. Rooms need to have a monitor.
  • What time should youth arrive at the lock-in and be picked up? Where do parents drop their kids off and pick them up?
  • What Rules will be enforced?
  • Create an ‘Incident Report’ form for any injuries, accidents or security breaches that occur during the lock-in?

Lock-in Publicity

  • Promotional fliers
  • Church Bulletin
  • Church / youth Calendar or events
  • Invitations
  • Sign-up form / Permission slips
  • Postcards to invite friends
  • Posters / Bulletin Boards
  • Website / emails
  • Local newspaper

Equipment and resources needed for the Lock-in

  • Are the tables and chairs available in the meeting rooms sufficient?
  • What is the capacity of the sleeping area(s)?
  • Sound system? Music?
  • Special lighting?
  • Special equipment?
  • Board games, sports equipment, materials for games?
  • Parking space? Drop off and pick-up point for parents?
  • Security?
  • Requisition forms for supplies, Checkout / return out form for any equipment or supplies that are borrowed?

Final Lock-in Preparations

  • Final Program schedule for the lock-in
  • Lock-in Attendee list – Permission slips must be signed by parents / guardians before teens are allowed to attend the lock-in. Keep the contact information together in a folder and available at all times in case of an emergency. Make a master copy and a standby copy.
  • Sponsor list
  • Emergency contacts
  • Fire, medical, and police department numbers
  • What is the name, address and phone number of the nearest hospital or urgent care facility? (This information should be included on your health form/parent release.). What is the most direct route from the lock-in venue?
  • What are the venue management contacts?
  • Prepare a Parent’s contact list.
  • Prepare a Volunteer list with assigned roles and contact numbers?
  • What transportation arrangements are required. Contact numbers?

Lock-in Volunteer Training

  • Screen Volunteers
  • Meet with volunteers as a group before the lock-in.
  • List responsibilities and contact numbers for each lock-in volunteer including a ‘Chain of Command’ – who reports to whom, who makes final decisions?
  • Make sure lock-in volunteers are clear on the rules.
  • Familiarize lock-in volunteers with the layout of the venue – especially exits, potential problem areas or hazards.
  • Assign people in your team to be responsible for cleaning up any spills/ broken glass as soon as it happens?
  • Trouble shoot with lock-in volunteers. What things could happen during the lock-in and how should the volunteers respond?
  • Have people and vehicles on standby to travel with youth in case of emergency.
  • Instruct lock-in volunteers in how to complete the ‘Incident Report’ form for any injuries, accidents or security breaches that occur during the lock-in and what information is needed. They need to get signatures of any eyewitnesses.
  • Go through the entire lock-in schedule. What resources are needed for each item on the schedule and who is responsible to make sure they are ready?
  • Lock-in Volunteers must be flexible and ready to help out as needed.

The Day of the Lock-in

  • Set up for games / activities
  • Delivery and storage of food and supplies
  • Post the rules in the venue where you’re hosting the lock-in. Go over the lock-in rules as soon as the teens arrive. Make your expectations clear. This will help reduce conflicts that might arise during the night.
  • Identify key volunteers to participants, especially the medical person.
  • Are all areas of your venue (including outdoor areas) adequately lit – especially for night time events?
  • Are floor surfaces clear of trip hazards and electrical cords?
  • Are all security, staff and volunteers easily identified with either a uniform, t-shirt, ID badge or cap?
  • Are Emergency/Fire exits clear of any obstructions and will they have adults monitoring them?
  • Are there first-aid supplies, fire extinguishers? If so, where are they located?
  • Are all exits monitored?
  • Prepare a secure area to store any bags until they are collected at the end of the lock-in.
  • Clean up – It’s important to leave the hall or building in the same shape as you found it. Involve everyone in this process.
  • Have people prepared to stay later after the lock-in as not everyone will leave immediately, parents may not pick up young people on time, or transport may be late.

After the lock-in

  • Return rental or borrowed items
  • Thank everyone who made the lock-in possible
  • Meet with the lock-in planning committee and evaluate. Ask: What worked well? What could we have done differently? What did we learn from this process?
  • Review any incident reports completed and see what steps can be taken to prevent similar incidents happening at the next lock-in.
  • Complete and file a written event summary including any resources and suggestions for future planning of lock-ins.

Special Cautions for a lock-in

  • Over-plan your activities so the teens won’t get bored during the lock-in.
  • Plan Bibles studies and spiritual discussions at the beginning of the lock-in when people are most alert and decisions are not clouded by lack of sleep or sugar highs!
  • If youth are of driving age it is recommended they not be allowed to drive home from the lock-in as they might not get enough sleep to take care on the roads.

Sample lock-in rules

  • All youth must sign indicating their agreement to these rules.
  • Unless other arrangements are made with a parent or guardian, each student is expected to stay the entire night, and will only be released to their parent or guardian.
  • No one is allowed to attend the lock-in without a signed parental permission slip and contact numbers. Parents may be called to verify if there is doubt.
  • Lock-in participants will not be allowed to go outside of church or venue without adult supervision, and if this rule is broken the parent will be called and expected to pick up their teen regardless of the hour.
  • NO personal video games, trading cards, or electronic devices
  • Any possessions are bags must be surrendered at entrance to the lock-in venue. Special medication or required items should be indicated on the parent permission form.
  • No illegal drugs, alcohol, dangerous materials, or firearms.
  • All lock-in participants must respect others’ physical boundaries. Inappropriate behavior (i.e.
  • physical intimacy or sexual harassment) is not permitted.
  • Same sex sleeping quarters will be provided. Lights out/quiet hours will be observed in these areas.
  • It is expected that all lock-in participants (youth and adults) will participate in the program. Adequate free time will be scheduled for fellowship and socializing.
  • Violation of these rules will result in disciplinary action and may include the participant being asked to leave the lock-in. Parents will be called to pick them up.
  • Take care of yourself
  • Be considerate and respectful of other participants and leaders
  • Be respectful of the meeting place.
  • Clean up after yourself.
  • THE ENFORCEMENT OF THESE LOCK-IN RULES IS EVERYONE’S RESPONSIBILITY. I have read the above rules and agree to abide by them.

This lock-in checklist is a guide only. It contains general information and is not intended to represent a comprehensive checklist.

Have suggestions to add to the lock-in checklist? Any words of wisdom? Please click on the comments link below and share with us your wisdom and experience in regards to organizing lock-ins for your youth!


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Ministry vs Job

Some people have a JOB in the church; others involve themselves in a MINISTRY.
What’s the difference?

If you are doing it just because no one else will, it’s a JOB.
If you are doing it to serve the Lord, it’s a MINISTRY.

If you quit because somebody criticized you, it was a JOB.
If you keep on serving, it’s a MINISTRY.

If you’ll do it only as long as it does not interfere with your other activities, it’s a JOB.
If you are committed to staying with it even when it means letting go of other things, it’s a MINISTRY.

If you quit because no one praised you or thanked you, it was a JOB.
If you stay with it even though nobody recognizes your efforts, it is a MINISTRY.

It’s hard to get excited about a JOB.
It’s almost impossible not to be excited about a MINISTRY.

If our concern is success, it’s a JOB.
If our concern is faithfulness, it’s a MINISTRY.

An average church is filled with people doing JOBs.
A great and growing church is filled with people involved in MINISTRY.

Where do we fit in? What about us?

If God calls you to a MINISTRY, don’t treat it like a JOB.
If you have a JOB, give it up and find a MINISTRY.

God does not want us feeling stuck with a JOB, but excited and faithful to Him in a MINISTRY.


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Youth Ministry Must be RELATIONAL

If you want to make a difference in the lives of youth, it all starts with relationships. Youth don’t care what you know until they know that you care. And as you spend time with youth you will discover that more is caught than taught. Christ always focused on the needs of the people rather than programs. Too often today I think we have flipped Christ’s priorities upside down focusing more on programs than people.

We have programs for Bible Study, programs for church membership, programs for the elderly, programs for evangelism, missions programs and a program for worship. The list of programs goes on and on. Everything has a program. And programs are good when they help us to systematize the processes, knowledge and skills that make a difference in the lives of the youth we care for. But not everyone fits into a program. Not every need can be touched by a program. Not all knowledge is transfered through a program. People don’t feel the love of God through a program. They experience the love of God when people care for them on a deeply personal level.

Programs can never replace a personal relationship. God set up a program of worship for the Israelites. Each tribe had a program and a role. He placed a system of laws to guide them and direct them. He created a program for people to repent and get right with God. The Israelites took his program and it became legalism. Pharisees followed the program. Worship followed the program. But God’s intention was never the creation and maintenance of a program. His intention was a relationship. Forgiveness and Restoration. A day to day walk in intimacy with the Creator. Ultimately God revealed himself most fully not in a program, but in a person!

Jesus walked among us. He cried for us, hurt for us, poured himself out to us. His sole desire —- a relationship. That we might be reconciled with the Father. That we might walk with Him. That we might experience the fullness of his love and his compassion.

Jesus called the masses, preached to them, healed them and walked and taught among them. But he focused on a few disciples.

Youth ministry is a primarily a relationship, not a programme. This applies to each aspect of youth ministry, such as Sunday School or Friday nights. They are not programmes – they are part of the strategy. The “programme” is to influence the lives of young people towards a relationship with Christ. Youth programmes must be designed to foster relationships between young people and their friends, the youth leaders, and other significant adults, who can have an input into their lives and help them toward the greatest relationship – that with God himself.

Youth Ministry Must be INCARNATIONAL

Jesus, God who became man, is the example for all ministry. His ministry was INCARNATIONAL!

Without giving up His divine qualities, He nevertheless became fully immersed within the culture of the people to whom He brought Good News. He was part of the culture, yet transcended it. He lived happily within the culture, yet was an agent of transformation. He was one of us, but challenged us to look beyond ourselves and our situation to a God that could do the impossible.

The incarnation is a challenge to understand and live within the world of youth culture. We must become immersed in youth culture but be above it both ethically and morally. We must live to higher standards knowing the more is “Caught” than “Taught.” But that does not mean we are aloof in any means of the word. We must have the greatest humility, we must personally feel the hurts, experience the pains, understand the struggles, recognize their needs, and love youth in spite of their flaws. We must look beyond those faults to the transformation that God’s love can make in the hearts of every sinner. We must become God’s love incarnate. We must invite youth to a deeper understanding and love relationship with God, not only with words, but with our lives.

We must make the Good News culturally relevant to young people, and take it into their world. The church must be inviting and welcoming, but if we are to really reach out to the world of youth, we must join them in the walkways and the byways of their life. We must gently step down into their world with love and a message of redemption and forgiveness — with a promise of a hope and a future. Going before them to prepare the way and inviting them to follow. We reach down to life them up!

When we become the message, there is nothing more powerful. When we become God’s vessel, even when broken, he can use us to draw the lost to himself. Maybe even more so when broken. Christ, our incarnational example became the greatest sacrifice when broken for our sins!


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Youth Ministry Must be INTENTIONAL

Effective youth ministry is more than activities to keep the youth occupied while their parents are involved in the church. It is more than simply having fun together, though fun is a component.

Youth ministry must be planned. What happens in a youth ministry must be the result of deliberate strategy, based on a vision for a desired future among your youth.

That desired future may vary a little from church to church, but ultimately it boils down to the Great Commandment and the Great Commission. It is a desired future where young people come to know and love Jesus as Saviour and Lord of their lives – to love the Lord with all their heart, soul, mind and strength. It is a strategy to make a difference to them and, through them, to the world – so that they might go into all the world and make disciples of all the nations.

Youth ministry will never be effective if it is just happens haphazardly, with no forethought or strategy. This is not to say that every aspect of youth work is meticulously programmed, but rather that each aspect of the ministry is carefully considered within the whole, and that there are genuine goals attached to each part of youth work.

Look at your youth ministry schedule. What is it that you are doing? Why are you doing it? Sometimes the “Why” is more important that the “How.” When you know WHY you are doing something, the “how” becomes much easier to plan!


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People and Programs

People and Programs

There’s always a struggle in youth ministry regarding whether we should focus on building relationships (People) and organizing activities (Programs). In reality they are two sides of the same coin. You cannot have one without the other.

Types of Youth Programs

While balanced youth programs have elements of each of these, there tends to be a primary emphasis in certain areas from program to program.

Evangelism based.
This may be a youth group or ministry which has as it’s primary focus evangelism. The ministry is centred on outreaches, door knocking, witnessing classes etc.
Key Inputs: Preach the Gospel – Matthew 28:20
Gift emphasis: Evangelism and preaching

Discipleship Based
In this group, building up and strengthening of believers is the primary objective. Maturity in Christ for each member is the goal. Training on how to discover your gifts, healing, prophecy, tongues may be common if from a Pentecostal background or if nor Pentecostal the emphasis may be on the lay mobilisation, lay ministry, team ministry where the minister is one of the team etc.
Key Inputs: The body life – Ephesians 4:11
Gift emphasis: Discernment of gifts, exhortation.

Ministry based
This involves a range of welfare or semi welfare type ministries designed to meet the “needs” of people. Some example may be a children’s club, youth centre, feeding program, craft mornings, visitation, ethnic fellowship times, morning teas, study or tuition group, after-school care, counseling, etc. Can also be any group which is service project based or involves community care of some type.
Key Inputs: The poor – Luke 4:11
Gift emphasis: Mercy, Shepherd

Teaching Based.
A strong teaching ministry – most members bring Bibles to session with many taking notes. Traditionally the meetings are designed for the committed Christian. In some groups the line between discipleship based groups and teaching based groups is blurred.
Key Inputs: The Word – 2 Tim. 3:16
Gift emphasis: Teaching, wisdom, prophecy (proclamation) and preaching

Worship Based
The main objective of this group is the celebration of God’s presence and honoring him with our lifestyle. The ministry has a strong emphasis on Music, prayer, Scripture, giving, meditation, worshipful drama or even dance.
Key Inputs: Character of God – Romans 12:1-2
Gift emphasis: Prayer, faith

Fellowship Based
The group is seen by new comers to be very laid back with a strong emphasis on fellowship events, meals and outings after the event is seen to be as important as the meeting itself. The group is relationship based rather than organisational based. Home groups have an emphasis on sharing.
Key Inputs: The Church as a community – Ephesians 2:19
Gift emphasis: Shepherd, encouragement


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Christian home or religious home?

There is a difference between a Christian home and a religious home. A religious home focuses upon the requirements of being a Christian, whereas a Christian home focuses on the relationship with God. Here are some of the characteristics of a Christian home:

  1. A Christian home is not legalistic but instead there is genuine intimacy and communication of God’s love and his desires for us.
  2. Family devotionals need to be a part of the family, but flexible, invigorating, full of variety and life. What a shame it is when we bore or burden our teens with religion rather then sharing the joy and love of serving God and growing in intimacy with Him!
  3. As parents we need to live by example – More is Caught than Taught. Principles mean little to a teen… example means everything! Those who are the best examples are not the ones supposedly living perfect Christian lives, but those who allow teenagers to look in and see what life is really like.. the struggles, the triumphs, the desire to grow. Expose youth to good models in other adults as well among your church members and friends.
  4. A teen’s view of God as the Father is often affected by earthly fathers. As father’s are we seeking to live in the example of the Heavenly Father?
  5. Perception is reality to teens… Don’t say the perception is false and ignore it… deal with the perceptions. Don’t see questions and doubts as threats but as opportunities to understand. Struggles are part of our spiritual journey.
  6. Don’t pretend to be perfect in your Christianity… be honest about your own faith and they will know that you are real… youth see hypocrisy quicker than anyone.
  7. Put a voice to your personal values and convictions and back them up by seeking to live by them.
  8. Remember that faith is a relationship with God, not a complete understanding. You don’t have to understand everything for your faith to make a difference. We use so much technology today that we don’t fully understand… the real issue is not how does it work, but instead how does it work for me. How does it make a difference in my life.
  9. Remember you cannot expect others to do your parenting work for you when you as a parent are the greatest influence on a child’s life. If you were to examine your life you will find things being transfered to your children… but very often it is our bad habits rather than our faith. Inspire your child. Spirituality is not demanded or forced but inspired and encouraged and nurtured.
  10. “Today’s church dropouts are not the kids; but their the parents. You can’t teach what you don’t know any more than you can come from where you have never been.” -Adrian Rogers If you want to see your child grow in their faith, you need to be GROWING in yours.
  11. You cannot do anything to be absolutely sure your teens will accept Christ because God gave each of us free will. But we can pray and live it ourselves daily!!
  12. Dt. 6:6-9 Talk about your faith at any time of the day (Note there is a difference between talking with someone and preaching!) Have a willingness to share plus a mental readiness to share when the time is right. If we want our children to desire the faith we have we must show its attractiveness… is the Christian life truly the abundant life for you or a burden.
  13. Make your home a place where other Christian teens are invited and welcome. Teens choose peers with needs similar to their own and as such can provide a clue to your teens needs and desires.
  14. Instead of getting defensive, as parents we must admit we are depending on Christ in our own weaknesses. Scripture teaches us to be vulnerable: “Not that we are competent to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God.” II Cor 3:5 Be real. You don’t have to be a superhero to be a positive spiritual influence in the life of a youth!

Actually, while these truths are critical principles for parents, they are true for anyone who wants to make a positive difference in the lives of youths. That includes youth leaders, teachers, mentors, and anyone that has regular contact with teens.


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Sunday School Teacher’s Pledge

Many churches are beginning a new education year and recruiting new Sunday School Teachers and youth workers. As such I have had requests for a simple Sunday School teacher’s covenant. Here is one that I have used in the past: (just replace the parts in brackets with your church name, ministry position or department as appropriate)

OUR SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHERS’ PLEDGE
Believing that the privilege of guiding people in the Christian way of life is worthy of my best, I pledge, as a [teacher, youth worker etc] in [Church Name] to:

  • Be an example to my students in speech and conduct, earnestly seeking to win them for God and grow them in Christ (Prov 11:30)
  • Be regular and punctual in attendance; and in case of unavoidable absence, give notice thereof as far in advance as possible (1 Cor 4:2)
  • Make thorough preparation for the lessons and my other duties each week (2 Tim 2:15)
  • Help my students to understand and love the Bible (Psalms 119:16)
  • Attend the planning meetings with my [Superintendents, Directors, Youth Ministry Team, etc] (Luke 14:28-30)
  • Co-operate wholeheartedly in the plans and activities of the church and [Sunday School Department / youth Ministry] (1 Cor 3:9)

With the help of God, I will do my utmost to keep this pledge. Amen.


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A to Z Ideas for Things to do with Youth

A few ideas from A-Z. Add your own as a comment!

A – Acting class, Art show, visit an Antiques Shop

B – beach party, bazaar, bulletin board

C – Chatroom (mlrc, msn), attend a Creative workshop

D – Dialogue nights, Dragon Boat races

E – Exhibition, educational show

F – Food

G – Giving Tree

H – Home (help) visits

I – Internet Café, icebreakers

J – Job hunt

K- Kayaking, Kite-flying, Karaoke

L- lock-in, LAN parties

M – Marathon, Music event, murder mystery party

N – Night out

O- Organic Food Tasting, Open Discussion

P – Pasta night

Q – Question and Answers

R – Retreat, religious event

S – Service, Swimming, Salsa

T – Tourist for a day, Temple visit

U – Understanding

V – Volunteering

W – Walkathons, Websites, Wilderness walks

X- X marks the spot – Treasure Hunt / Scavenger Hunts!

Y – Youth bulletin board

Z – Zoo trips, Zany–do (hair-do) days

Add your own as comments…


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Things to look for in Youth Ministry Volunteers

As your volunteers learn and grow, they will begin to exhibit characteristics that will identify them as effective volunteers. While not an exhaustive list, the following characteristics are the kinds of traits you want to see in your volunteer team:

• Good listening skills
• Empathy for teen perspectives on life
• Enjoyment of working with other teenagers
• Solid spiritual, emotional, and relational foundations in their own lives
• Patient, flexible, and affirming
• Perseverent
• Principled, but not judgmental
• Good relational skills
• A sense of humor
• Dependable

Set specific standards for leaders in your youth ministry. While your staff can be made up of people with various gifts, abilities, and personality styles, it shouldn’t be open to just anyone. The quality of your ministry will depend upon your ability to develop, articulate, and positively enforce your standards for what constitutes a qualified youth leader.


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V.E.T. your Youth Ministry Volunteers

To “vet” is to make a careful examination of something or someone. When it comes to finding youth ministry volunteers you need to both vet your program as well as your prospective volunteers. It also makes a handy acronym for three crucial components of working with volunteers in youth ministry:

Vision
Expectations
Training


Vision: Have a vision for your youth Ministry.

People are best recruited to a vision, not just a job. Help your prospective volunteers to see their responsibilities as a means to an end, not an end in themselves. Help them to see that they are a meaningful part of a team that is fulfilling Gods purpose among your youth. What you are excited about in your youth ministry that you can share with potential volunteers. What are the benefits and “payoffs” you can share? Present your vision of youth ministry and why volunteer leaders are needed in fulfilling that dream.


Expectations: Clearly outline your expectations.

  • Be honest about what you expect, about time demands, and responsibilities. While we often want leaders badly, we should not minimize the responsibilities. Trust that God will provide people who will be able to rise to the needs of the ministry.
  • Create a variety of positions and roles to match the needs of your ministry with the variety of gifts, talents, and interests of volunteers and considering the amount of time each volunteer has to offer.
  • Make a list of all tasks that need to be done to achieve a successful youth program, regardless of the size of the task or the significance along with the time required for each to be accomplished.
  • Prioritize – rate them according to importance and whether they are required or optional. Some tasks may be ad hoc and other tasks may require someone to fill a position for a predetermined length of time in order to fulfill them.
  • Develop job descriptions for your leaders that summarize expectations and provide estimates of how much time it will take to fulfill their particular responsibilities.
  • Make a list of those ad hoc, or event specific roles that could be handled without a long term commitment. Those who cannot commit to long term service might be able to take on a specific event, project or task on an ad hoc basis.

Be clear about what kinds of people you are looking for. The old acronym F.A.T. suggest that you should look for people who are:

Faithful
Available
Teachable

It is important that they are faithful both to Christ and to the youth ministry. They need to be available and ready to commit a portion of their availability to the youth ministry. And finally, they need to have a teachable spirit. They should see themselves as both teacher and student, leader and follower.


Train, Nurture, and Support

Adequately prepare your new volunteers for service and then continue to train them and provide a supportive and nurturing environment.

  • I DO -YOU WATCH
    (Observed leadership)
  • I DO – YOU DO
    (Shared leadership)
  • YOU DO – I WATCH
    (Trained leadership)
  • YOU DO – I GO DO SOMETHING ELSE
    (Owned Leadership)

This model requires time to train and develop your volunteers. It also needs to me personalized for each volunteer as they each will need varying amounts of time to work through the process based upon experience, gifts, and familiarity with the youth and youth program. Some can move to owned leadership in a relatively short time, while others will take much longer. Be patient. As long as there is a love for youth, it is worth the efforts to nurture them in this journey! There are also many good volunteers who have no desire to function at the owned leadership level. Remember that training is not just dispensing information to a group of people; it’s helping people to develop into servants who are more effective in their ministry with youth.


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Why We Often Fail to Use Volunteers

Insecurity
We may feel like we are imposing on others, or that others might think we are less than capable if we ask for help.

Lone Rangers Mentality
Remember, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto. It takes work to recruit, develop, and train and maintain a healthy volunteer team. Sometimes it seems easier to simply do things ourselves. As it says in Ephesians 4:11-12, the job of a leader in the Church is to “equip the saints for the work of the ministry”. The word “equip” means “to make strong, ready, and prepared for action”. Its out job, not just to do by example, but also to equip.

Control
We have less control when we give it away to others. Our youth ministry volunteers may not do the job the same way we would do it. It may be done differently, or not as well as we would do it–but it may be done even better! The best Youth leaders don’t demand carbon copies of themselves, but instead develop the unique gifts and talents of their volunteers to their fullest potential in ministering to the youth they serve.

Role Confusion
Volunteers need guidance and more importantly support until they learn the ropes. They will have a lot of uncertainty and need a lot of encouragement. Their expectations of results can be unrealistic and they may doubt their gifts and their ability to serve the youth. Clear expectations, procedures and systems for handling common issues, and carefully defined roles go along way toward helping to alleviate their uncertainty.

Shortsightedness
It may seem easier to do it ourselves, rather than hassle with finding leaders, training them, supervising them, etc. But if we don’t, we’re virtually guaranteeing ourselves a short-lived ministry. We’ll just burn out.


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Benefits of a Volunteer Youth Ministry Team

  • They can develop relationships with kids that you would not be able to reach on your own.
  • They can model a variety of personality styles and expressions of faith and devotion to God for your youth.
  • They can reveal the biblical model for team ministry. Although Jesus’ mission was to reach out to all people, he spent the majority of his time with his twelve disciples.
  • They will energize and motivate one another.
  • You will be encouraged both by the tasks your volunteers accomplish and the personal support they can provide.

Have you experienced other benefits? If so add a comment with your own observations…


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Youth Ministry Volunteers

Should you involve volunteers in youth ministry?

Are you doing the work of ministry to youth by yourself or do you involve others? And what roles do you delegate to others? One of the common misconceptions is that you involve others to do those jobs that you don’t like to do – as a chance to lighten your workload of the meaningless and time consuming tasks so that you can focus on the REAL ministry! This is a big mistake!

  1. You need to involve volunteers in meaningful ministry opportunities!
  2. It’s likely that involving others will take as much time, if not more time, rather than less time.

So why involve others?

Today’s youth are multi-faceted, and come from a variety of backgrounds, family situations, and personal experiences. They have numerous interests and a wide range of needs. To meet these diverse needs and engage the varied interests of youth, you need a team of volunteers with multiple gifts, of various personality types, and with diverse life experiences — all with a common love for God and youth. A successful youth ministry helps teens by building relationships with caring, growing Christians who can share God’s love with them.

Too often we think that since we are the youth minister, we have to be the leader and do everything ourselves. Many churches have the same idea – that they hire a youth minister to take care of their youth with the expectation that he will do everything needed.

Moses had the same misconception. You can find him struggling with this same issue in Numbers 11:10-17. He complained to God because he felt overwhelmed with the responsibility of leading God’s people. The work was never ending and the time was never enough! It seemed his position demanded more than he had to give. If you have been in youth ministry for any period of time, you know how he was feeling!

Moses asked the LORD, “Why have you brought this trouble on your servant? What have I done to displease you that you put the burden of all these people on me? Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries an infant… If this is how you are going to treat me, put me to death right now…”

In Exodus 18:18-23, Jethro, the father in law of Moses” went to him and said, “What you are doing is not good. You and these people who come to you will only wear yourselves out. The work is too heavy for you; you cannot handle it alone. ..Select capable men from all the people—men who fear God, trustworthy men… —and appoint them over thousands, hundreds, fifties and tens…That will make your load lighter, because they will share it with you. If you do this and God so commands, you will be able to stand the strain, and all these people will go home satisfied.”

The needs in your ministry, no matter what size your group, will always exceed your ability to meet those needs. Our first reliance should be upon God’s provision. But it should not stop there…we need to involve others in meaningful ministry as well.

When you share the burden with others your load may not be lightened, but your ministry WILL be multiplied.


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Five Steps Toward Better Student Leadership

If students are to develop to their fullest potential as leaders, we must be willing to take five basic steps to assist them in the process:

  1. Hear them out. Surveys, forum discussions, and other feedback times will help us learn about students’ needs and where they can be stretched and challenged.
  2. Use them. We need to give them responsibilities that they can handle so that they come to their group, not our group.
  3. Affirm them. Students are much more likely to keep on taking responsibility (and to rebound from failures) when they know our affirmation and encouragement. We must be careful not to take our student leaders for granted.
  4. Let them testify. The best way to recruit more student leaders is to let those who have served as leaders tell others about how they have grown through the experience of leadership.
  5. Be a facilitator. When students start to lead on their own, our jobs will change from omnipresent leader to facilitator. When students start their own small groups or host their own socials, we may no longer be needed at these meetings. Our students will need only our advice about how to lead. When we come to this point, we can rejoice, for we will know that they own the program.

Source: Organizing Your Youth Ministry


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Barriers to Communication with Youth

Ordering
Telling the youth what he/she should do. For example, “Stop complaining that your Spanish teacher gave you a failing grade. Go into school tomorrow and talk to her about it.”

Threatening
Telling a youth to do something, “or else . . .” – suggesting there’s only one acceptable course of action. For example, “If you don’t start studying more, I’m not going to work with you on your school work any more.”

Preaching
Telling youth how to act or behave – usually has a moralistic, ‘this is the right thing to do’ tone. For example, “You shouldn’t talk about other people like that.”

Avoiding
Trying to avoid problems or uncomfortable situations in the hope that they may go away on their own. For example, “Oh, let’s not talk about that. It’s so depressing! Let’s try to find something happy to think about.”

Pacifying
Trying to make a youth feel better without really addressing the problem. For example: if a youth says, “I feel bad because I was really mean to my little sister!” You reply, “Oh, don’t worry about it, I did the same thing many times.” Even though you may be sincere, you haven’t helped the youth resolve the issue.

Lecturing
Giving your youth unsolicited advise. For example, “If you want to get ahead in life you must really go to college. You should really work harder in school so that you can get into college.”


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Gridlocked?

How To Avoid Gridlock And Give Your Youth Ministry The Green Light

Sometimes in youth ministry it feels like being stuck at a red light with cars on the left and right. Nothing is moving! Frustrated drivers honk their horns! There’s no apparent way to move forward, nowhere to go. In every direction, for as far your eyes can see, there are obstacles to your progress. Sound familiar?

Here are 5 top tips to avoid the jams and give your youth ministry the green light to move forward:

1. Add alternative routes.

Over time, we find the programs, the routines, and the ways of doing things that work well for us, and it makes sense to keep using them. Don’t abandon these unless they have become dead ends. You know these roads will eventually get you to where you need to go! If they seem a little slow at times, simply take advantage of the situation to listen to the music on the radio and enjoy the time away from the fast lane.

But don’t get too reliant on just one way. If you know your destination clearly, there are often many ways to get there. Add alternative routes to the tried and trusted ones. There are times you may need to add and focus on a different lane for a while. When you open up new lanes and routes for ministry you increase your breadth and can actually move more people into a closer relationship with God.

2. Keep your vehicle in prime condition.

If your vehicle is leaking water, is out of gas, and in desperate need of a tune up, then when you approach any kind of difficulties on the roads, it’s going to quickly breakdown. It’s the same with your youth ministry and your personal spiritual life. Make sure you have routine maintenance of your personal spiritual life. Time behind the wheel is not a substitute! Don’t wait for things to break down before you get your personal spiritual life back in tune!

3. Stay informed of the conditions.

On the roads, if you stay tuned in to the latest traffic announcements, you can avoid trouble spots before you get caught up in them. Are you looking ahead? Are you tuned in? Do you respond? God not only knows the road ahead but the best route to your destination. When you are tuned in to what lies ahead you can make adjustments earlier and your journey will be smoother.

4. Be prepared.

Anytime you take a trip it pays to take a little water for the radiator, a spare tire, and a gas can. Breakdowns WILL happen. Accidents do take place. Be ready for them and your journey will be a lot less stressful. The key is to anticipate potential problems and make sure you have the necessary resources to deal with them WHEN they occur. But preparation is not just having the resources, but also a plan to deal with difficulties. Don’t forget to include something to keep things fun and interesting while you do what it takes to get moving again.

5. Support others on the same roads.

Helping others traveling a similar spiritual journey can be very rewarding and actually inspire and add a spark to your own ministry. If you saw a family stuck in their car in the sweltering sun with no water and you had extra, you could reach out and offer them some of yours. Carry a pair of jumper cables as you never know who might need a jump start You could provide the spark that gets their engine running again and their ministry moving forward. Brainstorm some options you could take to support fellow youth leaders around you.

Use these 5 tips to help your youth ministry moving along, even when the conditions become more difficult and obstacles start to appear.


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Purpose Driven Youth Ministry

Based upon the book: Purpose-Driven® Youth Ministry


PEOPLE
This perspective helps you identify the potential audience of students within and outside your youth fellowship. Knowing a student’s level of commitment enables you to design purpose driven programs specially meant to reach then and fulfill the biblical purposes of your ministry.

PDYM_model.jpg

COMMUNITY student is committed to not attending church – they are living apart from Jesus.
CROWD student is committed to attending church – they are hearing about Jesus.
CONGREGATION student is in a small group – they have a relationship with Jesus and other Christians.
COMMITTED student is committed to spiritual habits – they are growing in Jesus.
CORE student is committed to doing ministry – they are serving because of Jesus.


PROCESS
This practical process for students enables you to reach them for Jesus, connect them with other believers, help them grow in their faith, and challenge them to discover their ministry and honor God with their life.

This Transferable Strategy for Purpose-Driven® Youth Ministry is a process for moving students from living apart from Jesus to serving Jesus and sharing Him with others.

PDYM_model2.jpg

REACH students for Christ (Evangelism)
CONNECT them with other believers (Fellowship)
Help them GROW in their faith (Discipleship)
Challenge them to DEVELOP their gifts (Ministry)
HONOR God with their life (Worship)


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Evaluating a Youth’s Spiritual Walk

Do you evaluate your youth program simply by the numbers attending? What is a good measurement? It’s something to think about. How do you evaluate the effectiveness of your youth program?

Here are some other options…. YOU DECIDE!

  • By church activity participation?
  • By the fruits of the spirit displayed by the youth? (Gal 5:22-23)
  • By comparison to your own spiritual development?
  • By how Christlike they are? (I Cor 11:1)
  • By the fact that they have grown in their faith, making visible progress?
  • By the way they treat others?
  • By what they talk about most?
  • By their priorities?
  • By how they respond to me when I bring up spiritual things?
  • By spiritual depth?
  • By consistent spiritual disciplines like Bible reading, quiet times, prayer?
  • By the types of questions they ask?
  • By feedback from parents?
  • By their service to others and in church?
  • By spiritual knowledge?

OTHERS? Share your comments..
.


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Effective Youth Bible Study

To be most effective in your Bible study with youth:

Involve rather than inform
Suppose you had climbed a mountain and wanted to convey to your students the exhilaration of reaching the top and the relief at discovering that the grueling work was really worth the effort. Would it be better to tell them about your climb or take them to the top of the mountain with you? Taking them to the top would take more time than saying: “The results are worth the climb.” But which would impact their lives more deeply? It’s the same with Bible study: the more youth do for themselves, the more meaningful their learning becomes.

Listen rather than lecture
The one who talks is the one who learns. When you ask questions and make assignments that guide youth to express Bible understanding, they learn. It’s easy to let lectures go in one ear and out the other, but youth remember what they themselves say. They live what they commit to.

Direct rather than dictate
“Is this television program good for me?” “What is sin?” “How can I know the will of God?” Rather than telling youth what to do, guide them to Bible verses that address their questions. As youth make their own choices, they gain confidence in their ability to read, understand, and live the Bible for themselves. And they grow close to God who authored the Bible.

Be Active rather than passive
Youth tend to be full of energy. When there is an option to make things active, it keeps their attention and helps release their energy.

Make it cooperative rather than individual
Todays youth prefer to work in groups rather than as individuals. It takes off the pressure and allows the more quiet ones to contribute in a small setting that may not speak before the entire group.

Have a single objective rather than multiple truths
Choose one objective. Everything you do should reinforce, explain, support, clarify, apply to that objective.

Focus on changed lives rather than memorized facts
You don’t teach the Bible. You teach youth. It’s not what you have given them that matters, but what they leave with. Its not what you do, but what they do that evaluates an effective lesson.

Be an example in your expectations
Your attitude is contagious. If you like Bible study, your students will tend to like it also. If you present a learning activity with interest and expectation, youth will participate and like it. But if you say, “This was in the book and I know you will think it’s childish and dumb… “ they will think it’s childish and dumb. Expect great insight based on Bible truths. Your students will sense your expectation and fulfill it.


MORE IDEAS? See “Creative Object Lessons”

200 page e-book that explains everything you need to know when planning your very own object lessons. It contains 90 fully developed object lesson ideas and another 200 object lesson starter ideas based on Biblical idioms and Names / Descriptions of God.

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Developing Youth As Leaders

If students are to develop to their fullest potential as leaders, we must be willing to take five basic steps to help them grow into leaders:

  1. Hear them out. Listen to student needs and discover those areas where they need to be stretched and challenged.
  2. Try Them Out. Give youth responsibilities to learn from experience!
  3. Point strengths Out. Students are much more likely to continue to serve (and to recover from failures) when they have affirmation and encouragement.
  4. Shout it Out. The best way to recruit more student leaders is to let those who have served as leaders tell others about how they have grown through the experience of leadership.
  5. Help Them Out. When students start to lead on their own, our jobs will change to being a facilitator.


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Youth Ministry Tips: Variety

Don’t make every youth meeting “the same old thing!” Variety is he spice of life, especially with youth.

Here are some ideas for ways you can change things up a little bit!

  1. Rearrange the chairs or layout every couple of weeks.
  2. Rearrange your normal schedule for an event
  3. Involve someone else
  4. Use a different medium of communication- i.e. if you always use OHP try PPT, Flip Charts, Posters, Signs, etc to make your key points
  5. Add music, video, or other multimedia
  6. Change the location – i.e. do a Bible study on the feeding of the 5000 sitting in a field.
  7. Change the Decor – decorate the room like a football pep rally for a lesson on teamwork!
  8. Change your wardrobe – come to youth meeting in a hawaiian shirt, football uniform, dressed up as a Bible character
  9. Add Props – add a slingshot for a story on David and Goliath, add a ram’s horn Shofar for a story about the walls of Jericho
  10. Add a game
  11. Use teams
  12. Use Drama

Have you got some more ideas?… add a comment and let us know some ways you have added a little variety to your youth meetings!


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Ways Teens Lose Communication with Parents

clay_figure.jpgBe sarcasic
Never use sarcasm to belittle your parents: for example, “my old lady” or “my old man.” Do not act in front of your friends as if your parents are stupid, using gestures, words, looks of disgust-you know what I mean! Do not betray your parents by discussing them at school with your friends, laughing at their weaknesses and failures.

Publicly embarrass your parent
Do not contradict your parents in front of their friends. This will embarrass them beyond measure. Talk to them about it later. Do not talk impudently to your parents, especially in front of their friends. People begin to lose respect for you, too! Do not ignore the fact that you have been spoken to. Be courteous and reply, even if you’re about to bite yourself because someone has said, “My, how you’ve grown!” (What did they expect? you’re thinking!)

Be shocked
You must realize that it’s not the easiest thing in the world to be a parent. When your parent seems ill at ease in the discussion of sex, don’t make it hard on them by acting shocked at what they say or how they say it. Remember, they didn’t talk freely about sex like you do, and it’s hard for them to shift gears in this area. When you see your parent acting or talking in a way that shocks you, at the right time, sit down and ask them why they did this. If you can tell them how it affected you, a new understanding may follow, and you can talk more freely about some of your other hangups, and theirs as well.

Be dogmatic
Be sure when we want something, that we’re not stubborn with our reasoning. Do not rationalize your mistakes. Your parents will be much more lenient than you think if you will admit that you’re wrong! Remember that the surer you are about what you believe, the sweeter you can be when someone differs with you. It’s when you’re not sure that you tend to come unglued when you’re challenged.

Bluff 
You must remember that each parent alive has already been along the road you’re traveling. They’ve already used all those same excuses, rationalized just like you do, told “those little white lies” and half truths. Do you ever wonder how in the world they caught on? Well, teenager, they’ve been there before and know all the road signs! Bluffing probably does more to make a parent tend not to trust their teenager than anything else.

Be Negative 
Don’t make up your mind that you’re not going to like the thing that your parent will suggest! Or that just because your parents like a certain friend, an idea, or a situation it will be the worst possible thing that could happen to you! When you’re in your early twenties, you’re going to be surprised at how smart your parents have become! Remember that your parents are people, and that they’re probably doing the best that they know how to do! Now, they may make some glaring mistakes, but they do love you and want you not to make the same mistakes they did!

Can you take a difference of opinion as a teenager? 
How do you act when your parents differ with you as to whether you should do something or not? Do you throw a fit and froth at the mouth? Don’t you know a compromise can be reached much better if you remain calm and try to talk it over? It’ll be hard to control yourself, but it surely pays off in the long run! Do you greet your parents with the phrase “Everybody’s doing it.” and can’t understand their fury and their retort, “I don’t care what everybody’s doing. I’m just responsible for you!” Well, you see, because everybody’s doing it really isn’t a very valid reason for you to do it, now is it? Don’t you know some things that everybody’s doing that you know isn’t good or right to do?

Refuse to listen to your parent’s music!
No telling what you may find out about your parents when you listen to their music! Do they like the real dreamy, romantic, type of music? Well, do you see why? Because they’re that type of person!

Adapted from “Speak Out with Marge” by Marge Caldwell (Broadman Press)


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Ways to Lose Communication with Teens

question.jpgUse Sarcasm
“Anybody ought to know better than that!” -“You’re acting just like you’re two years old! Where’s your baby bottle?” It’s devastating to a teenager to be “put down” (talked sarcastically to) in front of his peers. Wait until alone with a teenager to discipline him or her if it is at all possible! Take them aside if needed.

Publicly Embarrass Them
If you know that show of affection in public is embarrassing to them, refrain from it. Do not try to monopolize conversation with their friends. Be sure that you are friendly, yet not trying to be “cute” and entertain their friends.

Register Shock
Under no conditions register shock by raised eyebrows, quickly drawn in breath, grimacing (various facial expressions that betray). Teens will be hesitant to be honest with you the next time.

Be Dogmatic 
The more sure we are about our stand on a subject, the less dogmatic we have to be. If you feel that you are being reasonable, then you can more easily listen to the opinions of others. There is a lot of difference between the courage of our convictions and just plain stubbornness. When we’re wrong, we should admit our mistakes, not rationalize. They already see through it, and to say “I’m sorry” is one of the greatest tests of maturity! We grow ten feet tall in the eyes of a teenager.

Bluff
One of the most disgusting things you can do is bluff a teenager, As I said before, they know when you do this, they can spot it a country mile! We tend to lose respect for the opinions of those who bluff their way around!

Be Negative
Youth is so wonderful because they have not learned to say “It won’t work” or “We’ve never done it this way before.” One of their most thrilling attributes is that they are positive and enthusiastic and full of optimism. They will automatically reject negativism.

Mold them into your own image
Challenge them as youth to be the best person they possibly can be, but don’t seek to make them a reflection of yourself or the person you’d hoped to be! They were born to be a dynamic expression of their own personhood. Challenge them to be their best!

Make all the Rules
How are the rules of discipline decided? Remember that if you make the rules together and decide on the discipline together, most of the time the teenager will be harder on himself than you would have been on him. They are mighty fair when they have a part in the rule-making. Each side will have to give a little. Remember that if you give in on some of the more insignificant things, that when the big issues are at stake, teenagers will be more amenable to compromise.

Be In a Hurry
It takes time for kids to mature! Expect teens to be teens and help them to mature. Look for those teachable moments and listen when they have those moments they want to share, no matter how busy you are. Don’t look at your watch as if you can spare only a few moments more when a teenager is telling you something very important.

Betray a Confidence
It is a sinful thing to betray a teenager’s confidence. This will close more doors than you possibly imagine! Never use a previous moment of confidence by a teenager to press home a point. This makes them sorry they ever confided in you at all!

Criticize their music!
Listen to their music. There are many signals as to what is going on in the young person’s mind as we listen to their music! The loneliness, the frustration, the fear of so many things, they’re all there! Teens also do not appreciate something with which they are not familiar. Instead of complaining about their music, see that some uplifting music is played within their hearing.

Adapted from “Speak Out with Marge” by Marge Caldwell (Broadman Press)


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Paradoxical Commandments of Teaching

  • Youth are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered. Develop a trusting, caring relationship anyway.
  • If you develop an unconditional philosophy in loving your youth, you may be accused of selfish motives. Love without hooks anyway.
  • If you are sucessful in your teaching, you may generate jealousy and envy from some people. Succeed anyway.
  • The little things you do for your youth will be forgotten tomorrow. Do the little things anyway.
  • Having uncompromizeable convictions and beliefs make you old fashioned. Have them anyway.
  • Prophets of gloom and doom are eager to let you know there is no hope. Have hope anyway.
  • People center on negatives and few positives. Develop a positive mental attitude anyway.
  • The energies you expend in being successful can be destroyed overnight. Be energetic anyway.
  • Your youth really need guidance, but may reject you. Give guidance anyway.
  • Give your youth the best you have and you will experience mixed gratitude. Give them the best you have anyway.

Adapted from Gene A. Bedley, Former USA National educator of the year


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The 5 C’s of Building Strong Families

strong_families.jpgCenter on God
Make all of life God-saturated. Make the Bible the most important book in your home and something the family reads everyday together. Pray with them and for them daily. Youth need to see the Word of God “fleshed out” in your life.

Care
This is “agape” love “that is unconditional, sacrificial, and unshakable.” We all need to be appreciated. Compliment your youth daily. Make it genuine and specific. Praise is the greatest motivation in the world for learning.

Connect
You must spend time with your youth. You can not buy your their affection. Youth are quite happy to exchange the luxury of “things” for their parents physical presence. You must be in physical proximity with your youth. Take them with you to the office or on an errand. If you travel spend as much of your “home time” with your youth as possible. Show your youth appropriate physical affection. A pat on the shoulder, a hug, a kiss, a hand held are means of touch that powerfully convey your approval. Discipline is also important but guard against abuse of any kind. Help them apply the principles that you have learned from God’s word.

Communicate
The less time spent in front of the TV the stronger the family. When the TV is off there is greater chance for conversation. Be spontaneous, be a good listener, be positive in your communication. Deut. 6:4-9 reminds all parents to teach God’s Commandments.

Commit
“Commitment is our resolve to always keep our families centered on God, to always love, to always build bridges to our children, and to always communicate to the best of our ability. It is a commitment to be a family no matter what circumstances or situations arise” (pp.16-29).

Source: Dr. William Mitchell and Michael Mitchell in “Building Strong Families”


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Tips from Youth for Youth Leaders

  1. Be yourself and don’t try to impress me with your education.
  2. TIME ….I can’t know you without spending time with you.
  3. Return phone calls! And return them prompt­ly
  4. Give me honest answers, even if neither of us like what you have to say.
  5. Realize that I wouldn’t be talking to you about my problem if I thought I could handle it myself. I’m depending on you for direction.
  6. Be honest with me about your own life and struggles.
  7. Don’t try to be a youth; we have enough of those around.
  8. If you are old enough to have a teenager of your own, approach me as a fellow struggler. If you don’t have a teen of your own, then approach me as one who is genuinely trying to understand.
  9. Stay current with resources you can recommend to me. I may need to read more about a subject and will expect you to know where to send me for help.
  10. Ask my opinion and allow others to help you develop the programs, trips, and so on.


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Tips from Parents for Youth Leaders

  1. Don’t try to do it all yourself. Learn the fine art of delegation.
  2. Remember that we were here before you and may be here after you.
  3. Don’t throw me or my opinions out just because I represent leadership from the former youth minister. Help me help you grow a successful youth ministry in our church.
  4. We may need to change, but gently help us change instead of forcing change on us without understanding.
  5. Don’t wait for a crisis to occur before we meet. My family needs to know you care even when life is going smoothly.
  6. Help me be a better worker by being organ­ized and prepared.
  7. Don’t be afraid of my experience as a youth worker. I may know as much or more than you do about working with teenagers, but I still want YOU to be their leader. Allow me to help you.
  8. Just listen sometimes instead of always having the “right” answer to my problem. I may just need to know somebody cares enough to listen to me.
  9. You teach me about the importance of prayer, so actually pray with me one-on-one.
  10. Praise me for the good things I’ve done.


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Why include Recreation and Games in Youth Ministry?

Youth programs that are “too spiritual” for recreation probably will not achieve those spiritual goals. Recreation is an essential part of youth ministry for several reasons:

  • Life-changing youth ministry primarily takes place in the context of relationships. Most young people’s lives are changed by gospel truth as that truth is interpreted in relationships. Games and recreation build relationships
  • Youth in churches that only permit very serious study sessions seldom discover trusting friendships that can lead to discipling. Recreation and games build trust.
  • Recreation can provide a way for teenagers to express hidden abilities, leading to an observable change in feelings of self-worth.
  • Quality recreation also can help troubled youth cope with stress. Contemporary teenagers are pressured to grow up quickly. Stress is a daily part of most teenagers lives. Laughing and enjoying a game of volleyball car significantly reduce the stress which these teenagers carried when they arrived at your youth meeting.


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Helping Youth to Understand Cults

Background Scriptures

  • Galatians 1:6-9
  • II Cor. 11:3-15
  • II Timothy 3:1-16
  • 1 Timothy 4:3-4
  • Colosssians 2:8-23
  • Proverbs 14:12

The ‘Marks’ of a Cult –

DEIFY MAN
Man may become a god. Man only needs to ‘progress’ (as defined by the cult and only with the cult’s help) to become like God.
Genesis 3:1-13, Isaiah 14:9-19, 2 Thess 2:3-4.

HUMANIZE GOD
Deny that God is ONE eternally. Deny the Trinity. There are ‘many’ gods and redefine God to Man’s image.
Romans 1:21-25 I Isaiah 43 :10-11 and 44:6-8 I Psalm 90:2

MINIMIZE SIN
Instead of man’s very nature being separated from God, sin is only specific acts that through good works can be perfected. Hell is redefined into bland or non existent punishment.
Romans 3:23, I John 1:8-10, Gal 3:10, Revelation 20:14-15

OSTRACIZE THE SCRIPTURES
They will add additional scripture and claim that there is error in God’s Word. Continual change of meaning in scripture.
Luke 21:33, Revelation 22:18-19, Isaiah 40:8, Acts 17:11

A DIFFERENT JESUS
Jesus is not the Son of God, but rather a son of A god – or He was just a prophet – or a created god – or our elder brother – or just a good man or a teacher.
Isaiah 9:6-7, John 1:1-14, Colossians 1:15-20, Hebrews 1:1-12

A DIFFERENT SALVATION
Deny Salvation by Grace, by the shed blood of Jesus on the Cross at Calvary and by true repentance of sin by a sinner. Usually will not see a cross on the cult’s structures. Salvation must include works, and quite often by a system dictated by the cult.
Eph 2:8-10, Gal 3:1-26, I Peter 2:24

DIFFERENT SPIRIT
The Holy Spirit is changed into a ‘good force’ or impersonal entity. Deny God the Spirit. Spiritism is, generally, rampant by having visits from spirits, counterfeit miracles, etc.
I Timothy 4:1, Deut 18:9-14, John 14:17

MODERN DAY PROPHET
Founded by man, followed by others who claim to be God’s one true spokesman on Earth. Accountable to no one but God. Gives revelation and scripture.
Jeremiah 23, Matthew 24:24, Hebrews 1:1-2, Deut 13:1-10;18:20-22

THE ONLY TRUE CHURCH
Their group is the only true way to perfection. The word ‘truth’ used over and over. Unless you are active part of their organization. You are lost. Deny the spiritual union of believers.
Col 1:18, Eph 1:22-23, Romans 12:1-8

SECRETS .. CLOSED TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD
Secret rituals, temples and doctrines. Finances not public. No communion with Christian body. All others are outsiders. No one knows the truth as they (and their prophet) do. Persecution complex.

CANNOT LEAVE
Always testing loyalty of followers. Obedience (blind) is primary. Leaders have all power – are followers intermediary with God – not Jesus. Only way to leave is by excommunication. Threats, Spiritual bondage, fear and guilt most common. If you leave, you are cut off from all in cult.

A cult is where:

  1. God is brought down to a lower level in regard to His identity. (What He is really like)
  2. God is brought down to a lower level in regard to His uniqueness. (Is there anyone else like Him?)
  3. Man is elevated in regard to his basic sin nature. (What he is really like)
  4. Man is elevated in regard to his potential. (Will man become like God?)
  5. Christ is brought down to a lower level in regard to His identity. (Who He is)
  6. Christ is brought down in regard to His mission. (What He came to do)
  7. Faith is reduced to a meaningless term. (Cults trust in the works of some part of creation for salvation)
  8. Heaven is presented as a place for the elite, or where everyone will go, or a place that is merely symbolic.


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Are your youth addicted to gambling?

The Diagnostic Standards Manual of the American Psychiatric Association indicates that pathological gambling behavior is indicated by the presence of at least four of the following characteristics:

  • Frequent preoccupation with gambling or with obtaining money to gamble.
  • Frequent gambling of larger amounts of money or over a longer period of time than intended.
  • A need to increase the size or frequency of bets to achieve the desired excitement.
  • Restlessness or irritability if unable to gamble.
  • Repeated loss of money by gambling and returning another day to win back losses (“chasing”).
  • Repeated efforts to reduce or stop gambling.
  • Frequent gambling when expected to meet social or occupational obligations.
  • Sacrifice of some important social, occupational or recreational activity in order to gamble.
  • Continuation of gambling despite inability to pay mounting debts, or despite other significant social, occupational or legal problems that the person knows to be exacerbated by gambling.


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Signs of Low Self-Esteem

  • Your child avoids a task or challenge without even trying. This often signals a fear of failure or s sense of helplessness.
  • He quits soon after beginning a game or a task, giving up at the first sign of frustration.
  • He cheats or lies when he believes he’s going to lose a game or do poorly.
  • He shows signs of regression, acting baby like or very silly. These types of behavior invite teasing and name calling from other youngsters, adding insult to injury.
  • He becomes controlling, bossy, or inflexible as ways of hiding feelings of inadequacy, frustration, or powerlessness.
  • He makes excuses like “the teacher is dumb” or downplays the importance of events like “ I don’t really like that game anyway”. Using this kind of rationalizing to place blame on others or external forces.
  • His grades in school have declined, or he has lost interest in usual activities.
  • He withdraws socially, losing or having less contact with friends.
  • He experiences changing moods, exhibiting sadness, crying, any outbursts, frustration, or quietness.
  • He makes self-critical comments such as “I never do anything right,” “Nobody likes me,” “ I’m ugly,” “It is my fault,” or “Everyone is smarter than I am.”
  • He has difficulty accepting either praise or criticism.
  • He becomes very concerned or sensitive about other people’s opinions of him.
  • He seems to b e strongly affected by negative peer influence, adopting attitudes and behaviors like a disdain for school, cutting classes acting disrespectfully, shoplifting, or experimenting with tobacco, alcohol, or drugs.
  • He is either overly helpful or never helpful at home.


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Signs of a Healthy Self Esteem in Youth

  • A sense of contribution.
  • A sense of making real choices and decisions.
  • A sense of self-discipline and self-control.
  • A sense of encouragement, support and reward.
  • A sense of accepting mistakes and failure.
  • A sense of family self-esteem.


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Eight Masks of Teens with Unmet Needs

Teenagers put on masks to hide their feelings. They choose these masks unconsciously, but the masks can express the feelings and thoughts of the teenagers. Here are the masks often used by teenagers

PENNY THE PERFECTIONIST
Teenagers put on this mask to prove themselves to their parents. This masked teenager becomes a perfectionist, compulsive about work and dissatisfied with personal accomplishments. This mask covers up the unmet needs of acceptance, unconditional love, and appreciation.

EXPLOSIVE EMILY
This teenager holds the pain, hurt, and rejection. Then one day she explodes, spewing angry words and negative behavior over anyone nearby. The explosion just happens. Teenagers in abuse situations may wear this mask, although other situations can cause deep feelings of pain and rejection. This mask covers up the unmet needs of comfort, respect, love and attention.

DIRECTIONLESS DOUG
This teenager lacks direction or purpose. He hangs out at the mall, not caring about school, sports or other activities. He may drop out of school and work at several low paying jobs. Occasionally a teenager wearing this mask runs away from home, but without a specific plan. Although this teenager doesn’t get attention at home, he lives at home because it’s rent-free. This mask covers up the unmet needs of direction and purpose, support, and encouragement.

CONFRONTATIONAL CHRIS
This teenager loves to pick a fight. He’s known for attacking others verbally. Debates usually turn into arguments. In some instances arguments end in physical confrontation. Violence or vandalism can be an expression of his anger. He may even join a gang or hang out with destructive friends. As a result, this teenager lacks hope, believing he won’t live beyond his teenage years. This mask covers up the unmet needs of encouragement,
Feeling valued, comfort and love.

PROMISCUOUS PETE
This teenager chooses sex as a substitute for love. For guys this becomes a sexual contest taken to extremes. For girls it can be a desire to belong to somebody _ anybody. Research has shown that teens will often use sex as a means to express and satisfy emotional and interpersonal needs that have little or nothing to do with sex. Sex becomes a coping mechanism to deal with the absence of love and affection at home. This mask covers up the unmet needs of love and affection, nurturing and support.

JILL THE JOKER
This teenager makes others laugh to get attention. At first the behavior is funny, but the constant jokes at inappropriate times and the constant demand for the spotlight make it difficult to tolerate this teenager for long. This ‘s parents never look beneath the humor to see the hurting. This mask covers up the unmet needs of attention, respect, values and appreciation.

SECLUDED SALLY
This teenager uses a mask to withdraw from the world. She sees herself as the victim of life. Everything that happens to her is intentional. Every criticism, correction, or suggestion is spoken to hurt her feelings. She trusts no one. She comes home from school and goes directly to her cave (room). This teenager nay not try anything like sport or going to camp because she believes she will fail. This teenager believes she is inferior because she feels inferior. This mask covers up the unmet needs of respect, appreciation, security, significance and purpose.

FRANK THE FOLLOWER
A teenager wearing this mask is easily swayed to the crowd. Even though the crowd may change (school, church, ball team), this teenager goes along with whatever they decide to do – well or bad. The mask covers up the unmet needs of acceptance, attention, being valued as a person, and love.

Application:
Reflect on the masks you youths might be wearing, and why and how you can help them to satisdy the unmet need that so the mask can be removed and they can be themselves.


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Murphy’s Laws of Youth Ministry

YOUTH MINISTERS HAVE THEIR OWN VERSIONS OF MURPHY’S LAW-“IF ANYTHING CAN GO WRONG, IT WILL.” I THINK YOU’LL RECOGNIZE YOUR FAVORITES, INCLUDING:

THE LAW OF LAST-MINUTE SUBTRACTIONS AND ADDITIONS 
Even though you’ve recruited the exact number of drivers you’ll need for your upcoming youth trip, it’s never enough. Five minutes before you’re set to leave, a driver cancels (or the corollary-three unexpected kids show up).

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Use a signup sheet for the trip with an RSVP deadline and make no exceptions. It sounds harsh, but this is a great way for young people to learn responsibility. Ask a responsible volunteer or group leader to coordinate your transportation needs. Then make sure you have a back-up driver ready just in case.

THE LAW OF DIMINISHING GAS 
Even though your facilities manager swears he filled the tank yesterday, the gas gauge in the church van always reads empty when you’re ready to leave.

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Inspect your vehicles the day before your trip or at least one hour before the kids show up. Make sure you have a church credit card or money for gas. And have a plan in case the vehicle breaks down while on the road

THE LAW OF FRUSTRATING PHOTOCOPIERS
Even though it was repaired last week, your photocopy machine will conk out five minutes before the meeting starts-and you still need 20 copies.

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Plan your schedule to prepare ahead of time so you can make your copies the day before the meeting

THE LAW OF VANISHING GUEST SPEAKERS 
Even though you’ve covered for yourself while you’re on vacation, the guest speaker you lined up will not show.

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Have a Plan B always ready. Tell another staff member about your plan so he or she can step in if there’s a last-minute cancellation

THE LAW OF EMBARRASSING DAMAGE
Even though you have seven cars hauling kids to the retreat, the one that gets “dinged” is the non-Christian parent’s car.

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Before the trip, warn your parent volunteers about possible damage to their vehicles. Check your church’s insurance policy to see if it might cover incidental damage. And when you plan a meeting at someone’s home, ask to rearrange the meeting place to remove anything that might get damaged

THE LAW OF INEVITABLE TARDINESS
Even though you’ve screamed your departure time from the rooftops, you’ll still pull out late because someone’s late or forgot the permission slip.

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Make sure you’re ready to leave on time. Many youth leaders model tardiness. Have a policy that you ll not wait for stragglers. Tell your group members to be on time or get left behind

THE LAW OF EMPTY COFFERS
Even though the church treasurer promised you an expense check before you leave, it’s time to go and you still don’t have it. Of’ course, the treasurer isn’t home and can’t be located

MURPHY’S BUSTER: Ask the treasurer to give you the check in advance Even if you don’t know the exact amount, let the treasurer decide how much to give you

Source Unknown


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The Needs of Youth

(in order of importance)

  • Physiological needs are the basic necessities of life.
  • Safety needs involve security, stability, protection, order, and freedom from fear.
  • Social needs are those involving the need to love and be loved, to feel accepted and to belong and to give and receive affection.
  • Esteem needs are those dealing with confidence and competence, self-image, self-respect, and esteem from others.
  • Growth needs are those dealing with potential and being all that one can be and become.

Some of youth’s greatest issues associated with these needs are those related to loneliness, poor self-esteem, and discovering self-identity. Other major issues include poor relationships with parents, school problems, prejudice and injustice, vocational decisions, and their desire to discover God’s will in their lives.


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Elements of Youth Ministry

  • Youth ministry is not a separate program, but works through and is channeled through church program organizations such as Christian education, worship, discipleship training, music, etc.
  • Youth Ministry is educational and evangelistic (teaching and reaching).
  • Youth ministry doesn’t put program areas against each other.  As such it does not conflict with or replace other church activities.
  • Youth Ministry is concerned with every aspect of a youth’s life


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Youth Ministry Objectives

  • To prepare youth for a lifelong walk with Christ
  • To help youth become aware of God as revealed in Jesus Christ, to respond to Christ in a personal commitment of faith, and to follow God’s will in the full meaning of church membership and Christian discipleship. This involves such things as new convert classes, mentoring by older Christians, and involvement of youth in church committees.
  • To guide youth to witness about their personal faith in Jesus Christ and to invite others to respond to Him. This can be done through evangelism training, contacts, inviting youth to visit w/ you, etc.
  • To help youth develop a meaningful and devotional prayer life. This can be encouraged through providing quiet time materials, accountability, journals, modeling/example, letting youth know how important it is for you, asking them for prayer requests and following through with them, telling them about your answered prayers and telling them things you learned in your personal prayer time.
  • To help youth experience worship in private and corporate settings. This can be done by letting youth help plan a worship service, having a youth time in the worship service, allowing a youth position on the worship committee, and having a retreat on worship.
  • To guide youth to participate in Christian missions and help them develop the skills these ministries require. Possible activities include establishing a “Food Bank,” special projects, Bible studies, a spiritual gift inventory, a youth swap with another church, back-yard Bible Studies, vacation Bible school, etc.
  • To help youth increase their knowledge and understanding of Bible truths and to apply these truths in every area and relationship of life. This involves discipleship, allowing youth to teach children, being a role model, etc.
  • To help youth grow in understanding and acceptance of self by affirmation, Biblical concepts of self-image, giving them positions of leadership suitable to their gifts, mission/ service projects, affrimation activities, etc.
  • To help youth understand and commit themselves to a Christian perspective of morality through seminars, role-playing, skits, fashion shows on proper dress, parent workshops, guest speakers, a commitment to purity service, role-modeling relationships, etc.
  • To guide youth to explore their abilities and talents and develop a Christian prespective on choosing a vocation. Helpful possibilities include talent shows, Seminar’s on taking aptitude tests, giving them leadership positions, having businessmen talk to youth, having a youth career day with representatives from different vocations in the church.
  • To guide youth in the stewardship of their money, time, and abilities. Use your personal example, a simulation game (ex. give each 1$ then make them keep track of what they spent that dollar on during the week), help run a soup kitchen, case studies, setting goals, making a budget, personal testimonies, seminars
  • To help youth develop a theology and rationale for being Christian in a world of religious pluralism. This involves parental education on cults, seminars on cults, studies on basic beliefs, scripture knowledge, visiting a service of another religion and then having a debrief time, etc.
  • To guide youth to adopt a life-style of Christian response to a world of limited resources and inequitable distribution of resources and power. Possibilities include defining Biblical success, sponsoring needy kids, having an offering for world hunger.
  • To guide youth to develop good habits in constructive use of their pleasure time.
  • To do this we need to hold them accountable for their time, teach them balance and priorities, and teach them about morality.
  • To offer youth opportunities for Christian fellowship and development of social skillss. This can be done by involvement in full church activities, integration, working with home-bound, alternative parties and activities, clique-busting, and serving within the worship service in various capacities.
  • To help youth and parents understand each other’s needs and to build meaningful family relationships. Possibilities include seminars, a parents of youth night, youth/parent retreats, Father/son trips, communications skits, Freeze frame skit with questions and seeking of suggestions, youth created dialogues and parent created dialogues, party with youth handcuffed to parents, Youth and Parent talent show
  • To enlist and equip adult leaders who will work effectively toward the objectives for youth ministry.


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How to Build Support from Leaders

Back Your Ideas

e enthusiastic about what you are doing
pproval of your superiors (i.e. pastor, etc) must be obtained
omplete your homework so that you have everything worked out in advance
now where you are going
There are a few who still not follow because:
ncourage you to wait until the time is right
tremely controversial Issue
annot Afford it
nproven that the old program will not work
ets a bad precedent
xplained as another Fad that will pass
ituation is hopeless
Dealing With Objections
irect people towards good ideas and help them see foolish ideas
mploy rationally with objective fact and figures in dealing with other objections
nswering some objections is impossible because you do not know
ine is fine between whether it just doesn’t work or it hasn’t had time to work.


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Barriers to Effective Communication

When communicating with your youth leaders, try to avoid the following:

By Passing

    Different words have different meanings.  Make your communication idiot proof so that no one can misinterpret it.

Allness

    We think we have said everything necessary after a few minutes. Always have a time for questions in order to check communication.

Guess Proneness

    Beware assigning hidden deeper motives to things.

Hardening of the Categories

    Beware over generalization, all teachers are alike, all _____ are alike, we need to recognize differences in people.

Either / Or Thinking

    Beware of categorizing things into boxes (i.e. “churches are either X or Y.”)

Blinderness

    Like blinders on horses, sometimes we can only see one way to do something. We need examine other possibilities.

Thalamic Reaction

    Think before you react.  Don’t jump to conclusions.

Misuse of Small Talk

    Do not give information through small talk.  It is not an effectivemeans to spread information as it may not be taken seriously

Misuse of Labels

    Labels are dangerous as they have a connotation of permanence and of being true 100% of the time.  Neither is true.

Misuse of “And”

    1. Beware adding responsibilities.. please do X

and

    1.  Y.  “Additional”
    responsibilities “multiply” the work.


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The 7 Cries of Today’s Teens

For several years now the Gallup Poll has surveyed thousands of teenagers to discover their most important needs. The seven needs listed below have been in the teen’s “top 10” list for the last 6 years.

  1. The need to be trusted. Teens believe that their elders distrust them and regard them as rresponsible and unpredictable. Teens today want to be taken seriously – and we, as their parents, would be wise to create an environment at home that allows them to earn that trust.
  2. The need to be understood and loved. Please note that the teens who responded to the survey did not asked to be “fixed and made whole.” I believe they know their lives are in heavy transition at this point. But the data from the research is clear that teens tend to believe that their elders do not understand them. Teens crave to be listened to and loved . . . preferably by parents or guardians. (And if they don’t get this need met by you, Mom and Dad, they’ll go somewhere else!)
  3. The need to feel safe and secure. Say what? Wild, reckless, self-confident teenagers who know no fear need to feel safe? That’s right. They need to know their home is secure and their school is safe. Sadly these days such is not always the case.
  4. The need to believe that life is meaningful and has a purpose. Studies show that this is a growing need in the populace as a whole. Society in general is realizing that there are moral absolutes – and I’m convinced that Millennials (pre-teens and teenagers) can be the transitional generation for bringing spiritual revival to the world!
  5. The need to be listened to – to be heard. Though this might sound like #2, there’s a huge difference between feeling “understood” and “listened to.” The latter takes time, and the breathless pace we lead our lives doesn’t make that possible. As parents, we need to make sure our kids know they are being listened to and being heard.
  6. The need to be appreciated and valued. A poor self-image is a key factor in anti-social behavior . . . just ask the residents of Columbine and Paducah. Roughly one-third of all respondents to the Gallup survey indicated they felt worthless and unappreciated.
  7. The need to be supported in their efforts. This means anything from helping with homework to showing up at Little League or soccer games. Its one thing to get your kids involved in a lot of activities; the real benefit to your children, however, is when Mom and Dad also participate.

By and large, teens remain eternally optimistic, particularly about their personal futures. At the same time, however, they are apprehensive about the future of society as they face a host of problems that simply were not on the scene just a few decades ago.

They need you adults to stand in the gap with them. They have a heavy load to bear. But, with God’s help, you can make a difference in their lives. After all . . . you’re not just raising them to be good kids – you’re training them to become responsible adults!

(Excerpted from the book, The Seven Cries of Today’s Teens: Hear Their Hearts, Make the Connection by Tim Smith)


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Youth Workers Survival Kit

Toothpick
To remind you to pick out the good qualities in others… (Matt 7:1)

TestaMint’s
To remind you to refresh yourself from God’s Word Every day (Psalm 119:11)

Aspirin
For the headaches that come with the job of ministering to teenagers.

Nuts
To remind you that you have to be a bit nuts to work with youth

Rubber band
To remind you to be flexible, things might not always go the way you want, but it will work out…(Romans 8:28)

Band Aid
To remind you to heal hurt feelings, your or someone else’s… (Col 3:12-14)

Pen
To remind you to list your blessings everyday…Eph 1:3

Eraser
To remind you that everyone makes mistakes, and it’s okay… (Gen 5015-21)

Post It Notes
To remind you to stick with it and you can accomplish anything with Jesus…(Phil 4:13)

Mints
To remind you that you are worth more than a ‘mint ‘to your heavenly father…(John 3:16-17)

Time Out
To remind you to relax daily and go over that list of God’s blessings…(1 Thess 5:18)

Jolly Ranchers
To remind you that our attitudes on Sunday mornings are important.  Attitudes are contagious.  If our attitudes reflect our joy about being here it will spread to the teens.

Life Savers
To remind us of our ultimate purpose, to point our young people toward a deeper relationship with the greatest Saver of all- Jesus! (Phil 1:9-11)

A Highlighter
I hope that working with teens will be a highlight of your year.

Kleenex
For the tears we shed on account of our teenagers, and for wiping their tears in times of hurt and frustration.

Spiritual Journal
Because it is important to take care of yourself spiritually.

Three Musketeers Bar
To remind you that you are not in this alone.  You have my support, love, and encouragement.  I want to help you in any way I can, professionally and personally. And of course you have the greatest support anyone could possibly desire in our Lord.


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Youth Personality Types

Dr. G. Keith Olson, in his book entitled: “Why Teenagers Act the Way They Do” outlines some personality types of youth.

1. The Power Oriented and 2. Competitive

The power-oriented personality needs to see self in control of lives.  The competitive personality chooses competition as the primary way of relating to others and has extreme narcism.  The primary difference between competitive and power-oriented personalities is the use of power.  The power oriented personality uses power to develop skills for maturation and growth, but the competitive personality uses power against others to enhance him/her-self.

3. Aggressive and 4. Rebellious

The aggressive personality attempts to push others away and position itself against others and seeks to cause them pain and psychological injury.  The rebellious personality wants to push others away or withdraw from social experience, but unlike the aggressive personalty he/she is not interested in revenge.  The self-demeaning personality has a lack of belief in him/her-self and is submissive and practices passive withdrawal.

5. Dependent and 6. Conforming

The dependent personality prefers to rely on someone else who will assume responsibility or adopt the leadership role because he/she fears he/she will be inadequate or fail if he/she was to have that role.

The conforming-personality seeks to reduce anxious feelings by being accepted and liked and may sacrifice too much of him/her-self in an attempt to gain the acceptance of others.  The responsible personality is as close to the social ideal as adolescents get and is a blend of power oriented and conforming personalities that follows through with commitments and respects authority.


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Creating a Climate of Cooperation with your Youth Leaders

Care must be genuine
Orders that you know will not be followed should never be given
Only use punishment in extreme cases.
(Discipline sets fences & boundaries.  Punishment functions when discipline breaks down.)
Public praise or blame of an individual should never take place
(There are some times when you should praise publicly, but don’t give the appearance of playing favorites)
Employ personnel policies which help people
(i.e. people oriented instead of task-oriented)

Restrict yourself from manipulating people
Avoid passing the buck
Try to understand people’s needs. 
(family situations, motives, etc.)

Educate yourself in knowledge of when and how to listen.


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Understanding Youth Needs

(in Order of Importance)

1. Physiological needs: These are the basic necessities of life.
2. Safety needs: These involve security, stability, protection, order, and freedom from fear.
3. Social needs: These involve the need to love and be loved, to feel accepted and to belong and to give and receive affection.
4. Esteem needs: These deal with confidence and competence, self-image, self-respect, and esteem from others.
5. Growth needs: Those needs dealing with potential and being all that one can be and become.

Some of youth’s greatest issues associated with these needs are those related to loneliness, poor self-esteem, and discovering self-identity. Other major issues include poor relationships with parents, school problems, prejudice and injustice, vocational decisions, and their desire to discover God’s will in their lives.

 


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Enlisting Youth Leaders

E xpect God’s guidance through prayer
N eglect no possibilities when making a personal list of potential leaders
L essen the fears of potential leaders by working to overcome barriers they may have to serving
I nitiate contact by mentioning the possibility of working with youth
S tructured situations with youth should be observed by potential leaders
T rain potential leaders by enrolling them in a training program.

Youth Leader training should begin with a broad prospective and progressively narrow in on the specific job you have in mind
1. Spritual foundations
2. Spiritual Leadership
3. Basic Youth Ministry Leadership Skills
4. Youth Program Organization its Structure of leadership
5. Specific Youth Leadership Position


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